Through These Brown Eyes

What it do boo?

2012-02-18T08:26:00.000-05:00

For some reason that question makes me laugh. It has nothing to do with whatever this blog is going to be about. Well, I guess because I am just blogging off the top of my head and don't really have a topic in mind. Hence the title being the first thing that came to mind :)
What's been going on in my slice of reality? The group home I used to work for called me one night asking if I could fill in for someone. I was shocked. I haven't worked for that company in about a year. I assumed I didn't work there since they had not been calling me to fill in. *shrug* What make it funny was that the manager called me at about 10pm wanting me to be the house at 11pm. Ummmmmmm no! Then she had the nerve to have an attitude and be short with me. I am sorry. You have been in this position for many years now. You know that part of your job description is to try to find someone to fill in a shift when someone calls out, no matter what time it is! Don't get mad cuz you calling the bottom of your list of part time substitutes and nobody can help you therefore you gotta get your butt out the bed and fill that shift. THAT'S YOUR JOB BOO BOO! Whatever.

My current group home gig is going okay. This company runs things 110% better than the old company. Unfortunately, like most group home type places, the turn around is high. Most people that work where I do are UNC students and students come and go like the wind. Right now my only mandatory shift is on Sundays, but since one coworker left to pursue a position that is closer to her field of study and my shift leader had to leave due to medical necessity I have been picking up hours here and there. I try not to pick up too many because Pooka has told me that she wants more of my time so she will have it. Period.

School is sorta kinda over...lol. What I mean by that as of this past Wednesday at noon, 2/15, I have completed all my GRADED course work for PT school EVER! We have 4 modules left: 4 weeks of pediatrics and clinical decision making, 4 weeks of geriatrics and a business type course for those that may want to open a clinic, 6 weeks of specialities (I picked the neuro course), 24 weeks of internship at Duke medical center, then 12/9/12 around 2:30pm or so...GRADUATION!!!!! Everyone keeps saying how fast the 3rd year goes and I am starting to believe it. I still can't believe a school let me in and I actually did pretty well in the program! I can't believe that a year from now I could be starting my career and not just working a million jobs. I hear that the board exam to get my license isn't a joke and it's a 5 hour test that will drain me mentally. I sooooooo looking forward to that....NOT! LOL! Anyways, I am just happy to know that I won't be tested on things I learn from here on out. One of my professors told me to treat these next few months like continuing education courses, make the most out of the experience, and that at this point in the game I already know everything I need to know to be a successful PT even though I may not feel like it (which I don't), LOL!

Pooka is good. She tests for her high red belt in Tae Kwon Do today. Every facility has a different belt system, so the belt Pooka will test for today is two away from black belt which is always the last color no matter where you are. After high red there is deputy black then black. I am glad we were able to find an activity that she absolutely loves! The place she goes is amazing and everyone there is like family. I am very fortunate to have an organization like that in Pooka's life. They look out for her a lot and it's genuine care. As far as school she is all B's. She used to be B+'s and A's. We are working on getting her back to where she was.

Next school year she is going to middle school. *sigh* I will be the mother of a middle schooler! *sigh again* To say I am not ready is an understatement. I am not really sure if Pooka is ready for it. Middle school is a different world from elementary school! So much transitioning going on with that population of children. Fortunately many people from Pooka's Tae Kwon Do school already attend the middle school and will still be there next year so Pooka already has friends there that can help her out if she needs it. One of her best friends goes to the school and they are soooooooooooooooo excited to be going to the same school next year. That's I keep hearing about from the both of them! It's cute.

Well that is what is going on in my world. Let me catch up on yours :)

I've been tagged

2012-01-24T22:19:00.001-05:00

My blog is screaming for something new and Ms. Gorgeous Pudding over on the right tagged me giving me something to blog about. Right on time! I am supposed to keep the chain going...but I am not. LOL! I suck, yeah I know! :oP I am supposed to answer her 11 questions so here it is:

1. Are you currently doing what you want to do in life?
I am in the process of my dream career so I will say yes.

2. What is your absolute favorite way to have fun?
Cranking up some great music and dancing. I.LOVE.IT!

3. How many siblings do you have and what birth order are you?
I am an only child biologically. I have an 17 or 18 year old sister from my father's 2nd marriage and an 11 year old brother and 9 year old sister from his 3rd marriage (that is in the process of divorce). Give or take a year on their ages, LOL!

4. What's your fantasy car.
I don't really have one. I sat and thought about it and nothing in particular comes to mind. Hmmmmmmm

5. Where is the last place you vacationed?
What is a vacation? LOL! I guess going to MD to hang with my mom and company will have to count. Other than that I went to Myrtle Beach for my 30th birthday almost 2 years ago...wow, I must do better. That fact is sad, LOL!

6. Do you wear jewelry and do you prefer gold or silver!
I don't really wear much jewelry. If I do it's a pair of silver or white gold hoop ear rings. That's about it. I subconsciously take jewelry off. No joke.

7. What's the best thing you've ever eaten?
Coffee ice cream....OMG! It is my weakness! *sigh*

8. What colors is your bathroom decorated with?
My bathroom is brown, tan, and blue...I really want to change it up and make it look all pretty but I have yet to get my interior decorating mojo going.

9. How often do you exercise?
I walk the trail every chance I get. Being that I picked up more hours at work I have been sporadic with it, but I do walk around the block with one of the residents every Sunday so that counts for something I guess. I refuse to buy a gym membership. Pooka and I have started going to the indoor pool on Fridays (so far we've been twice) as part of our bonding time. So, I guess the answer would be...here and there :)

10. Do you want children? If you have children do you want more?
Hmmmmmmm, the honest answer is I don't know. Some days I do, most days I don't. I would strongly prefer not to be a single mother of two or more. I don't think I can handle it. I know it's not good to assume the relationship with the father will not work out, but I don't know if I want to take the chance of bringing another life to the world and not being able to give it what it needs and taking even more time away from Pooka. It's just not fair.

11. What is your least favorite food? If you had to eat it for 1 month for a million dollars could you?
The first thing that came to mind was liver...of any animal! I just can't get with it no matter how the best cooks prepare it. Just not my thing...unless I am getting paid a million for eating it a for a month...then I just have to suck it up, pinch my nose and make it do what it do! Hey, it's only a month! LOL!

Thanks for the tag Gorgeous Pudding!

Happy New Year!!!!!!

2012-01-04T18:48:00.001-05:00

Life is great right now!

Got my school loan check this week! This is good because this is when I go to my landlords and secure a roof over me and Pooka's head for a couple of months! Such a good feeling. I was going to pay off Mia but an emergency came up that I needed to take care of...then this morning when I went to get my oil changed the mechanic found a leak in the coolant housing *sigh*. A simple oil change turned into something more complex and expensive. BOOOOOOOO! The only WANT item I purchased was some sweat pants and a grande mint mocha from Starbucks! So I call that great! It's amazing how fast I went from sort of baller to normal in less than 48 hours! hahahahaha

I have a 15 page paper to write. I've known about this paper for 5 weeks now. It is due next Thursday. I only have 3 pages complete. Today was my day to sit and and crank it out. I need time to shoot it to someone to make sure I wrote in English so the sooner I can pull it out my butt the better. I haven't even opened the document today. *smh*

The entire PT department is moving to a building down the road. In the process of this move I have almost doubled my professional library and obtained a coffee maker and microwave...FOR FREE!!!!!! Things like this makes my day I swear! :D

I brought in the New Year at Lsbnmom's house. We toasted, I kissed my youngin', I waited to see if Beyonce was going to perform, then I went to Lsbnmom's guest room and went to sleep! I worked until 10:30 pm Saturday night and had to be back at work at 8 am Sunday. Can you say holiday pay? When I got back to LM's house to get the kid there was a beautiful home cooked meal prepared and a house full of her loved ones present having a good time!

I am blessed beyond belief and I have absolutely nothing to complain about. Everything in my life that I don't care about is fixable and I am glad for the option to be able to change!

Happy New Year!

Santa was good to me :)

2011-12-26T17:19:00.000-05:00

Right now I am posted up in my grandma's living room kicked back watching VH1 Soul (and blogging) Shirley Murdock is on saaaaanging and I keep pausing to sing the chorus with her! LOL! Pooka is gone doing her bonding thing with her father. My mom is taking a nap and my grandmother is doing God knows what downstairs. She is tipsy and fiddling with stuff, LOL! *Okay I have learned she was taking the security ink thing off some "hot" pants she brought....gansta! smh

I am still tripping that my grandma and 'em have wireless over here. Both my mother and grandmother simply refuse to learn how to use a computer! My friends think I am bad with technology...they never met my mom or grandma! LOL! My grandmother has declared that my aunt and I are addicted to our cell phones and computers. To an extent she is right. All the plans that I have made to meet with my DMV friends were made via internet or text so I have been on one or the other quite often since I've been here.

My father has a fb page. I am BLOWN! I accepted his request but I put his butt on restricted access. LOL!

I've been here since Wednesday night and will be here till about lunch time Thursday. So far this trip has been wonderful! Normally when I come home I am here for the weekend so I don't have a chance to see folks. This time is different! I have had the chance to hang out with folks I've grown up with that I've haven't seen since Pooka was born and she is 10! It felt great hanging with my old school friends that love me no matter what. I am supposed to get up with TZ today but can't seem to find that chick *ahem ahem cough cough message ahem ahem* Then I am supposed to hang with a few more folks before I leave. I am already dreading going back to responsibilities and all that awaits me back in NC. But alas, I have a few more days to enjoy this much needed mental reset and will.

Santa was good to me this year. Outside of the real awesome stuff (time with fam and friends) I got clothes, a food chopper, boots *with the fur* and $$$). Pooka's father brought me some smell goods from Bath and Body Works. It was completely out of the blue. So at some point before he brings Pooka back tomorrow I will go pick up a small trinket or something to give back to him. When he picked Pooka up he said he wanted to talk to me. I won't lie and say I am not curious about what he needs to say, but I'll wait. My fam kept it really simple and easy with the gifts because going into extreme debt was no an option for any of us.

Well guess I'll go check out what's going on on FB now *sigh*. Every time I log on I see someone got engaged yesterday. Kinda sweet and romantic! :)

How do the Housewives of whatever city do it?

2011-12-20T13:38:00.000-05:00

I have been on holiday break from school and work since Friday and I am BORED!!!!!!!!!!

The house is clean. I made a big meal for me and the kid to eat off of till we hit the hwy. The internet only has but so much to look at, I've exercised on the trail and been "Just Dancing"/MJ experiencing daily. I organised closets and threw away stuff. I've called people I haven't spoken to in awhile to catch up. I've cleaned my car out. Now what?

I guess if I had some decent money and lived like the "housewives" I could call everyone over to have a spa day in my personal spa or something! LOL!

Oh well.

Other than my boredom life has been the same for the most part. I got a Christmas card in the mail from Snookums and it was very nice. It will probably be the only physical card I get this year and I am cool with that. I have never been one to send holiday cards. I may do a birthday card here and there but that's about it.

Sometimes it's hard not to miss him.

I reactivated one of my online dating accounts. I have learned that what I want does not exist. I put what I want in the search engine and literally no results come back! LOL! That's a sign I need to focus on me!

While surfing the web I saw a new pic of J. Hudson. She is really shedding the poundage. I think she should stop but most people think you're a "hater" when you are big and say someone is losing too much. *shrug*

Pooka and I are going to MD for Christmas like we always do! I am excited! We don't have plans and probably won't do much, but it's being in the house I grew up in with my family that means a lot to me. Speaking of Christmas...I had the Santa Clause talk with Pooka and this lil rugrat chose NOT to believe me!!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHA I was not expecting that reaction but whatever! She is going to middle school next year *OMG* and I didn't want her to go in still thinking there was a Santa. Now don't get me wrong...I have never endorsed the idea of Santa but I never discouraged it either. Just like the tooth fairy.

Being that I am still a student, December is a hard month for me financially. It sucks that I can't really provide gifts to those that I would love to give gifts to. Especially when I know a few folks that are going to get me something even though they know I am not buying gifts for anyone outside of Pooka. I know it's the season of giving and some people give because they want to give. But it still makes me feel awkward not to give in return *shrug*. Everyone in my immediate fam has money coming after Christmas (ex. I get paid on the 29th) so I think I may just take my mom and 'em out to a nice place to eat.

Fortunately Pooka wants simple stuff for Christmas. She wants art supplies, easel, bedroom slippers, and some toy I never heard of. Her dad got the art supplies and that toy I still don't remember the name of and I got her the slippers she wanted and will be buying her the easel. I told her that when we got back from MD I will take her to the store and let her pick out the one she wants. I also got her new safety gear and uniform for TaeKwonDo. It won't be back till after we get back so she won't be opening it Christmas day.

In January I would like to take my local NC friends out to eat too, just as a thank you for helping out and keeping me sane type deal. Last year we went to a Asian restaurant, don't know where I'll invite them this year. Yes, I know there is more to gift giving then food, but it's one of those things that everyone likes (when they can order what they want), everyone likes to get out of the house from time to time, and most cooks I know like to not have to cook every now and again :) It just works!

One realllllly cool thing that will happen at the end of this month is I make my last car payment! Woot woot! I can't believe it! I just hope and pray stuff don't start happening when Mia becomes 100% mine! Awhile back I started having tire issues. People would tell me about how low my back driver side tire was. I'll pump it up and keep on going. Well in the past 2 weeks I had to pump it up 3 times so I decided that I needed to get it looked at. Turns out, I had a screw in my tire! The tech said it must have been in my tire for a long time because of how worn it was *shrug* I am just thankful that it was something simple and fixable. I was NOT in a position to buy a tire!

Let's see....New Years....I work New Years Eve till 10:30pm, then go back in at 8am the next day! Can we say holiday hours???? I knew you could! LOL! I was supposed to work Thanksgiving evening but I was able to give those hours away to someone who wanted them. I gave them away gladly! I strongly prefer NOT to work Thanksgiving afternoon/evening or on Christmas. Any other holidays I really don't care too much. "They" say that what ever you are doing when the new years comes in is what you will be doing all year so I guess my 2012 will be spent sleep or dancing with my Wii. We shall see! LOL!

I have gone from being a daily blogger, to weekly blogger, to monthly blogger! HA! Darn shame. LOL!

P.S. My father sent me a friend request on FB! OMG! Eventually I accepted it but put his behind on restricted status! What is the world coming to?

Testimony

2011-11-30T16:07:00.000-05:00

I have most Wednesdays "off". I put that in parenthesis because even though I don't have to drive to campus on Wednesdays I still have work to complete, but that's not why I am blogging.
This am after dropping the kiddo off to school I took a walk around the lake. During my walk I was trying to figure out my budget. I get paid x amount every other Friday and this check coming was not going to cover my expenses. Earlier this month I borrowed from folks, so when my last check came it went to paying everyone back! Not a good cycle at all :(. I was prioritizing absolute needs and finally came up with a plan. It was gonna be tough, but I didn't have much choice.

I went to the grocery store to pick up items and over wrote a check (yes I still own checks) to cover my gas to Elon and back till Friday. I had a ton of coupons so I did pretty darn well if I do say so myself. Anywho, I shopped, came home, cooked and was washing dishes when the phone rang. The caller ID said "insert old bank name". I assumed it was a telemarketing call so I did not answer it. Then a few moments later my voicemail indicator popped up. I checked the message and it was a rep from the branch I used to go to asking me to call him back. I was thoroughly confused because I closed my account with said bank well over a year ago. I called him back to find out what he wanted. Long story short he wanted me to know about some new program they had that I qualified for. He mentioned that he noticed I have not used my account in a long time and suggested I move my money over to a savings account....

"What money???? I closed my account over a year ago!" I said as my confusion grew stronger.

He then tells me what my balance is. I tell him it's an error. He tells me it's not and suggested I go to my local branch to figure out what is going on. So I throw on some clothes and do as suggested. Long story short, on Friday I will be officially closing that account and walking away with a check that will cover all my bills for the month with some money to spare for groceries! BOOYAH! I would have closed it today, but they started this new monthly fee thing several months ago and they are going to refund that money back to my account. I have to wait for the refund to hard post to my account tomorrow before I can withdraw it to close the account.

When folks be saying that God makes a way out of no way. They are not lying!

Amen.

I should blog...LOL

2011-11-26T10:44:00.000-05:00

School is okay. We started on the 7th then once we got our feet wet we had this whole week off for Turkey Day. Once we get back in next week we will be off again for Christmas! Score!
Pooka is doing well. She hasn't been feeling 100% the last few days but she is better now.

I am still working with people with developmental disabilities every Sunday. Thought I would have to quit, but things worked out.

Turkey Day with the fam was amazing as always. I love them folks! My mom still is not mentally ready to drive/ride down here so she stayed in MD. She is having a blast with the house to herself. My almost 3 year old cousin is a handful and my mom is enjoying her time not having to keep an eye out for him!

Pooka and I are going up that way for Christmas, as always. I have not decided if I am going to make that a trip to visit friends or not. We shall see.

These past few weeks have not been the best for me, but they definitely have not been the worse and for that I am thankful!

Happy belated Gobble Gobble Day!

5/25/12

2011-11-07T06:01:00.000-05:00

It's Monday, about 6am.
I will hit send, turn laptop off, wake the kid, wash my butt, dress and all that prepare for the day stuff, drop the kid off......*sigh* then begin day 1 of commuting back to school on the regular. Right at this moment I know exactly how Pooka feels on the 1st day of school after a long summer vacation! You are excited to see your friends you haven't seen in several months, yet the idea of being back in school is saddening. *insert toddler tantrum here* Iont wannago bacta sckool!!!!!!!

I just have to remember that after 5/25/12 my graded classroom work will be over...FOREVER!!!!!!

Watch the throne!

2011-11-02T19:18:00.000-05:00

10/28 was my last day at the skilled nursing facility and the end of my 3rd clinical rotation! I didn't cry but when I left I got a lot of hugs and kisses from patients and it made me sad. I swear 8 weeks just flew by! This week I had off and I have spent it cleaning...deep cleaning. I cleaned out my closets, washed EVERYTHING, took one of my old computers to the recycling center, fixed my garbage disposal (thanks to the internet), changed my room around as much as I could and took many, many, many, many naps! LOL! I threw away 3 pairs of shoes and all the socks and underwear I had that had holes or didn't have a match to it. Same thing with my earrings. I love silver hoops and some didn't have matches so the lonelies had to go! LOL!

I am not looking forward to the commuting back to campus nor the sitting in class all day long, but this is the LAST stint! From November to May (laced with breaks for the holidays) I got to do this classroom thing, then selectives, then my 6 month internship (which still hasn't been confirmed *sigh*) then I come back for a week for a board exam training class then on 12/9/12 I walk the stage and graduate! BAM! Can't.wait.at.all!

Other than that things are cool. Pooka is great. She has been doing well academically and her report card comes on Friday. I must admit I am kinda anxious to see it!

Went to the Jay-Z and Kanye west concert. Greensboro was their second city on the tour. My grade? "B". Why? Well 2 things...first off, the show had a 7:30 start time and with no opening act they hit the stage almost 2 hours late!!!!!! FAIL!!!!!! The show itself was decent but the sound was wayyyyyy too loud! Yes, I realize this is a concert and concerts are loud, but it was so loud you could barely hear what they were saying! I spent most my time texting and facebooking my frustrations. One would think as detailed and peculiar Jay and Kanye come off to be, things would have been better. The next day I looked at some reviews online and they basically said the same stuff I was posting. Turns out they started 2 hours late during their opening show in Atlanta and the sound was crappy there too! Ugh!

Well at least I can say that I've seen Jay Z live and that I have brought 1 of baby Jayonce's diapers and a pair of shoe strings for Kanye! LOL

1010

2011-10-06T21:29:00.000-05:00

I have been looking at my blog trying to figure out what I can blog about. It's still the same ole same ole around this camp, LOL!
Pooka is doing fantastic! Her progress report came home and she was at or above target in all subjects and it said keep up the good work! YAY! I couldn't take 100% of the credit though. Over the summer Pooka's father and his main live in lady brought her a 5th grade level math book and had her work through it over the summer. Pooka hated it, but she happy with the results of her summer work so far. As a reward I told her she could have anything she wanted within reason. She asked for one of her homegirls to come spend the night. No problem. It was set up for her friend to come hang with us tomorrow and I take her back Saturday after we go see Dolphin Tale, but the friend is now on punishment and can no longer come over this weekend. Pooka wasn't too thrilled. I am still gonna take her to the movies.

My clinical rotation is still going good. I like being in a building full of people that could be my grandparents. LOL! When they discharge you get hugs and kisses and most are so appreciative. Love that. Hate the way the medicare/medicaid system pretty much dictates what happens as far as patient care is concerned, but I am not going to get on that soapbox.

Work is work. I don't know if I blogged about it but I accepted another group home job. I was going crazy not working, LOL! I started in August. I have officially been signed up for the every Sunday shift. I pick up other shifts when they are convenient. I like this arrangement and think I can keep this job till I start my career in early 2013 :)

I can't believe 2011 is almost over. I looked over some of the long term goals I set in January for completion by 12/2011 and I have hit most, come close to some, and is no where near 1...only one. I can't complete it in 2 months (lose 100 pounds) so I am okay with not hitting that long term goal. I graduate 12/9/12 so I still have time do finish this goal before I take pictures I may want to pay someone for, LOL!

2012 is a year of transition. I will blog about it again before year end but 2012 is when Pooka transitions to middle school (it's 6th, 7th and 8th grade here) and I obtain my DPT. The plan is for her and I to go on one of those Disney cruises to celebrate together. I think it will be fun! I hope I am able to budget well enough to make it happen. 2012 is also the year I pay my car off! Woot woot! If I play my cards right I don't have to move until 2014 *fingers crossed cuz I don't like moving*

Between the Hulk action figure on my desk, the poster and hulk hand toys in my closet. I have officially decided that I like the Hulk! LOL!

October is Physical Therapy Month!

I didn't know who the Apple guy was until he passed. If you look at my FB home page you would have thought this guy was the second coming! *smh* It sucks when anyone dies, but I really don't get why massive folks are upset right now. I just don't...and no, I don't own an iAnything.

Speaking of death, I am strangely getting used to people dying. In my professional life that is. Being that I "work" in a nursing home, death occurs pretty often. Some of those that have expired I have treated in therapy. I have gotten to the point where I can say "Mr/Ms. So and so passed? Dang, that sucks" then manage to go about my day. Now I will say that none of my favorite patients have crossed over to my knowledge, but I think I will still be able to function and get my responsibilities taken care of soon after finding out.

I like Pocoyo! He is a little clay animation character on a show made for babies that can hardly talk! As simple as it is, whenever it is on somewhere I get sucked in to watching it! ROFL! I just have to laugh at myself!

Post 1010 complete!

Gotta love random thoughts!

Good night!

Mirrors

2011-09-26T20:18:00.002-05:00

Today and tomorrow I get to work with other therapists due to my CI being out of town.

Today I got to co treat a 44 year old African American woman that is morbidly obese and had 2 strokes (left and right) among other medical issues.

Pretty, young, woman that had everything going for her...laying in bed as I type that's unable to much of anything on her own...in a nursing home. *sigh*

I saw myself in her. It broke my heart.

I can't take life for granted.

Tales from the SNF! (Skilled Nursing Facility)

2011-09-19T18:17:00.000-05:00

Day 1, week 3 of 8. So far so good! I think I need to start journaling some of my experiences so when I look at my blog entries later I can remember these times with more detail! Right now my feelings and rating on PT is acute care > inpatient care > outpatient care. Not that that means anything to anyone who may read this! LOL!

Today was a great day! Two weeks in and I already have my own case load of 7 patients. I started at 9 (can't start till my CI, clinical instructor, comes in) and finished completely by 3 notes and all. My CI was surprised and impressed. She reviewed my notes because she has to co sign them. She only had 1 comment about 1 out of 7 of my notes and it was only to clarify what one statement said because it could be interpreted different ways. I am feeling so good right now. One thing I love about the inpatient setting is that you get to follow the progression of your patients. In acute care (like a hospital) you see a patient for 2-3 days if you are lucky then they are discharged.

Today at the SNF I was walking my patient down the long term care hall and there was a lady sitting outside her room. She speaks to me...

"Is your name Mary?"
"No ma'am, it's Ladynay."
"Mary?"
"Ladynay."
"Nay?"
(close enough) "Yes ma'am, Ladynay. I have to go. Have a good day!"
"Okay Mary, I will see you tomorrow!"

I love older people! LOL!

I love new teachers!

2011-09-06T12:47:00.000-05:00

So as I am cleaning up and enjoying my last day off before my 3rd clinical starts I get a call on my cell from a local number that's not in my contacts. I pick up and it's Pooka's new art teacher. She was calling to tell me that 2 young men were throwing things in art class and Pooka was indirectly hit in the head with an eraser (the fairly soft black rectangle ones). She spoke for about 5 minutes about how she called the 2 boys parents, spoke with the kids again about the rules in the art room, how upset she was that Pooka got hit because she's so sweet and minds her own business, how she checked Pooka out and there was no lumps, how Pooka kept telling her she was okay...so forth and so on.
In my head I was like...you really called me just to tell me my child got hit with an eraser???? But I guess I would rather be called than not called *shrug* I expressed my thanks for her thoroughness and told her I was glad it was an eraser and not a pair of scissors. She agreed, talked a little more (she is a chatty one, the old art teacher that retired was too but not like this one) then finally ended the conversation.

I wonder how long the phone meetings will last with her? Hmmmmm. LOL! I love new teachers!

Still nothing going on for real for real, LOL!

2011-08-31T20:46:00.003-05:00

Howdy!

Haven't blogged or read blogs in awhile so I am going to spend some time catching up after I jot down a few words.

So what has been going on?

Hmmmm. No communication with Snookums. We did exchange a couple of texts messages after all the bad weather hit, but that's about it. It sucks but out of my control.

I completed my second clinical rotation on the 26th and I love love love love love acute care and the location I did my rotation loved me! I wouldn't be surprised if that turns out to be my first job after getting licensed. Two other Elon grads already work there! One of the PT's is having a cookout on Saturday that I will be attending. I fit sooooo daggone well with them cats it's crazy! LOL!

During my rotation at the hospital I did encounter my first brush with racism. Long story short, I went in to do an evaluation of a patient and her husband was in the corner. He didn't say much of anything. I thought nothing of it. I did my thing and left. Came back the next day and the rehab manager pulls me and tells me that her husband put in a complaint against me the day before and when he went to investigate the white male husband told my white male manager that I was incapable of providing his wife with the services she needed because I was I was black. My manager asked him specifically what I did that wasn't to his liking. There was nothing. Then the husband asked if he could have a white male PT. My manager agreed. We as patients can choose our health care provider. If we don't like who we get we have the right to change it so I can't be mad. Just sucks that racism and all that is still alive and kicking. The couple wasn't that old either. I would put them in there late 50's early 60's. Oh well. I still love acute care!

This week I have off. I have been bored as hell. Pooka is back in school so she is gone most of the day. I have learned that my brain does not function right unless I have a million things to do. Oh Pooka had a great time with her father this summer. Plans are for her to go back next summer! YAY!

I picked another PRN (as needed) job at a group home kinda like my old weekend gig. I just need some money coming in.

On Tuesday I start my 3rd clinical rotation at a skilled nursing facility. This should be interesting.

Ummmmm what else? Oh! Went to the Jill Scott, Anthony Hamilton, Mint Condition, Dougie Fresh, and DJ Jazzy Jeff show last week. Great show! Dougie Fresh and Jazzy Jeff had everyone straight partying! Going to Myrtle beach weekend after next. Going to see Sade on 9/10. I am expecting a good show but on that chill, laid back, calm vibe. Going to see Jay Z and Kanye in October. Stomp in November. I type most of this out because I have been forgetting a lot lately. I really need to get back to having a bunch of stuff to do soon. LOL!

Welp, dats bout it!

Lata!

Untitled

2011-08-10T03:37:00.001-05:00

My relationship with Snookums started slowing down awhile ago. Didn't really feel the need to blog about it. Now the relationship has officially stopped. He suggested we discontinue talking to one another. Don't have much choice but to comply. It wasn't a nasty breakup. Neither one of us wanted it to happen, but it did. Fucking distance. This hurts. We both hurt. I've lost a friend. I don't know how to cope with this right now. So lost. Thought blogging would help. I was wrong. What's really fucked up is the only thing I want to do right now is call and talk to him. It's what I'm used to doing when I'm upset...

Pay check

2011-07-29T15:59:00.003-05:00

I was going to start this blog with a photo taken over the summer of Pooka riding a pony but it's not working. Oh well. I miss her a lot. Looking at the photos her father emailed me made me miss her even more. She is scheduled to return the weekend of 8/21.

Today was interesting. I spent my morning with a cardiac rehab PT, shadowed another acute care PT for about 2 hours, then went to one of the group homes I interviewed for to see if I'd like the environment. "Work" went okay. The group home was VERY nice. After you interview with the HR folks they schedule you to go to the home for about a half hour to meet some of the staff and residents. After your home visit to make sure your still interested you have to call HR and let them know you are still interested. Again, the group home I went to was VERY nice. Much nicer than my old weekend gig. Immediately after walking out I called and left a message on the main HR persons voicemail letting her know I was still interested. So I guess I can say I am employed again. Yay! I think the next step is scheduling me for all the training courses I need to take. They sound like all the same type courses I took for the old weekend job so I am going to ask if I can test out of them and go ahead and get started with getting to know the residents.

On my birthday weekend I went to dinner at this nice spot down the road from my home. It's kinda pricey but they play live music so it was nice. I plan to again this weekend to hear a reggae band. Nothing is confirmed. Lately I've been making plans and changing my mind at the last minute. LOL!

Kinda glad a pay check will be rolling in again. I need to buy tix to see Frankie Beverly, Earth Wind and Fire, Jay-Z and Kayne, Stomp, maybe Wicked, and some Heat vs. Bobcats. I need a job to finance all this stuff! LOL! I already got my Jill Scott/Anthony Hamilton and my Sade tix so I am good in that department! Poor bank account! HAHAHAHA!

31 years, 31 answers

2011-07-25T00:01:00.001-05:00

Happy birthday to me,
Happy birthday to me,
Happy birthday to meeeeeee,
Happy birthday to me! *clapping*

So I got about 15 questions which is cool. I stole questions16-31 from a meme done by F. Deaky to make my 31. So here we go!

1. Where do I see myself in 5 years?

July 25, 2016. I would be a brand new 36, been out of school and practicing for over 3 years. Pooka would be about to turn 15. Hmmmm, I see myself in Raleigh in a 3 bedroom home chilling. Maybe working for one of the local hospitals since at the moment I love the acute care setting. I’ll be at least ½ my current size. Lord knows how long my hair will be, LOL! I don't see anything being extravagant. Just me living a nice, simple and stable life.

2. Where do I see myself in 10 years?

July 25, 2021. I would be a fresh 41, practicing 8 years, Pooka going on 20 (OMG!!!!) hopefully I won’t be a grandmother. Still in NC if not Raleigh still. Same home, same job…just sending Pooka some change every now and again so she can wash her clothes and eat something other than Ramen on whatever campus she’s on. Still living that nice, simple, and stable life. Hopefully my passport would have been put to some serious use by this time.

3. What would I tell a single mom who wants to go back to school but has a million reasons not to?

Basically I would tell her not to bother if she doesn’t really want it. It’s not easy for the young, single, and childfree person to go back to school and complete successfully so it’s that much harder for a single parent. You have to have a plan, a budget, both long and short term goals, and a support system. You have to want it bad enough. PERIOD! Screw the folks that are going to tell you what you can't do and throw a bunch of negativity your way for whatever reason. They don’t dream your dream. They don’t have to support your seed unless you get on a government assistance type program (but they be all up in your business and nobody wants that if they don’t have to have that). For the million reasons/excuses you find a million and one reasons to go for it! Then I would tell her about my situation and things that I’ve done and hopefully it would be encouraging.

4. Why have you been resisting the Internet-y goodness of Twitter?

No real reason. I just don’t really see the point of it when I can jot quick thoughts on my blog or facebook. I’m pretty sure 95% of the folks that would follow me are already linked to my facebook anyway. The celebrity aspect is kind of cool, but from what I understand, the majority doesn’t respond or have their ghost writers respond and only tweet because they are paid to mention some place. I’ll pass.

5. If you could have one area of your life absolutely perfect now, what would it be and why?

It would be my appearance. As much as I like to stand out and have benefited from it. I would love to be smaller and have my dental issue solved. It’s more for professional reasons than personal.

6. What's your biggest regret so far in 2011?

Not keeping up with most of the goals I set for myself. They are small, very attainable goals and I still let myself down. For example, I told myself that I didn’t want to get anything below a B+ for my neuro module. That I was going to study at least 2 hours a night to assist in accomplishing that. Well…I passed…but not with B+’s or A’s.

7. What's a song that you have to sing along to whenever you hear it?

Wow, there are so many songs that I have to sing but PYT – Michael Jackson was the first to come to mind. I am one of those types that usually sings to just about every song that I hear, even if it’s just in my head, whether I know the words or not! LOL!

8. What is your biggest regret?

Hmmmmmmm. This one really took some sit and think time. At the moment I can’t think of any real regrets to have a biggest one. One that comes to mind is being too scared back in the day to tell a guy I was interested in him in whatever way I was interested. I kind of stuck to only talking to guys I knew were already looking my way. I’ve gotten better with this with age, though I can’t say that I am completely unafraid.

9. What's your greatest challenge?

Right now it’s PT school, LOL! That and recharging that “I CAN” attitude within myself every day. There are days when I ask myself questions that start this roller coaster of negative thoughts and doubts. When that happens it’s a real challenge to get myself out of that mode.

10. If you could go back 10 years, what would you tell yourself, based on what you know now?

I would tell myself to love myself more and not to worry so much about what was going on in my household with Pooka’s father. I wouldn’t tell the younger me when or how the relationship falls apart because as much as it sucked, I learned a lot from that entire experience. I would reassure me that Pooka and I would be okay when it was all over and despite what 2001 Ladynay thought…. *don’t laugh* Pooka’s father will NOT be the best sex or love making experience in my life.

11. What brings you joy?

God, music, success, accomplishment, watching Pooka playing or doing anything that makes her happy or excited, knowing that I am loved and cared about, feeling beautiful, spending time with my friends, being able to provide the needs and the occasional wants of my child and I, and of course….Hagan Daaz coffee ice cream! J

12. You have two round trip tickets to anywhere in the world. Where do you go, who do you take, and why?

I would go to London with Pooka because you didn’t say all expenses paid so if I go to London I could stay with my best childhood friend for free and that would take care of a good chunk of my expenses and travel worries. She would take us around and would know first hand where we should go and what we shouldn’t waste our time doing while we were there.

13. What's the next technology upgrade you want and when do you think you'll get it?

The next tech thing I will probably end up getting is another VHS/DVD combo if they still sell them. The one I have now is slowly dying and Pooka has too many VHS tapes she likes to watch for me to not have something that can play a VHS tape. I will probably get it before the year is out unless my current combo holds out longer than that. I like my equipment to be almost if not absolute useless before I replace it.

14. Are you going to finally follow a football team this year?

Last NFL season I chose 2 teams to follow: the Panthers and the Steelers. I wanted to pick at least one team from each conference. There was no real serious reason to my choices other than one is a current home team and the other team has tried and true, die hard fans…well at least all the Steeler fans I know are. So that’s what I came up with last season. Neither team made the Superbowl last go around, but I am okay with that.

15. When did you know you wanted to be a Physical Therapist?

Well ever since about 7^th grade I wanted to be an athletic trainer (ATC). I was on that path up until I got to NC Central University. When I transferred to NCCU I had to have a sit down with my academic advisor. During this initial meeting she asked me what I wanted to do. I told her about my goal to be an ATC. She told me the specific requirements for that program, two of which was being on campus a lot and traveling with the various sports teams. Being that I lived off campus and worked full time that wasn’t going to work for me and I told my advisor this. Then my advisor asked me if I ever thought about physical therapy. She basically broke it down and explained how they are similar fields. She also explained that the main differences were I wouldn’t have to be on campus that much, I’d have to be in school 3 more years, have more options career wise, and make more money in the end…so I switched majors from AT to Exercise Science! J The exercise science majors had a curriculum that would provide me with all the courses I would need to apply to PT school. As I started to do the volunteer work required to get into PT school I fell more and more in love with it. The rest is history.

16- What do you want people to say about you when you die?
She was truly a good person with many friends and a few foes.
17- How long does it take you to get ready to go out?
Depends on where I am going and if my hair is involved but usually I give myself 30 mins – 1 hour

18- If you were an animal what would you be?
A koala bear. It’s cute and sweet but don’t get it twisted, it’s still a bear and will rip you apart.

19-      What’s your biggest fear?
Toss up between catching/dying from an STD and failure

20-      What’s your most prized possession?
My first thought is to say my child, but I think they mean material so I will say my degrees. I say that because they are a reminder that I can reach my professional goals despite with my inner doubts say at times.

21- What’s the funniest word you can think of?
I don’t know....oompa loompa! LOL

22-      Do you get along with your parents?
My mom is the bee knees! The man who had sex with my mom that day in October 1979 can kiss my butt. I tolerate him at best.

23-      What do you look for in the opposite sex?
He has to make me feel like a grown woman and I must be attracted to him. Being smart is icing on the cake!

24-      What was the most difficult thing you had to do?
Waiting to see my mom in the ICU when my fam were in that accident in May. Worst day EVER!

25- If you were given one day to live what would you do?
Eat all my favorite foods, have unprotected sex with *the best sex to date*, shave my head so I could see how I'd look bald, close my bank accounts and give the money to my grandmother, put my car in my moms name (I don't have too much left on it), have the utilities turned off, drive the car to MD, fill out any documents needed to get Pooka transfered to a school in MD, write Pooka a letter, take her somewhere fun (I wouldn't tell her it was my last day) make sure I tell everyone I love that I loved them. Then finally try to think of a funny last blog post and fb status so people will smile when they visit my page to post their thoughts/condolences.

26- If you could relive any day of your life either for good or to change it what would it be?
Hmmmmmmmmmm....I really don’t know. I would redo today and get more stuff done, LOL! So unproductive....

27- What’s the worst feeling in the world?
Waiting to throw up! Ugh! That is the worst!

28- The best?
Taking a big number 2! You feel like a million bucks every time! LOL!
29- If you could meet anyone who ever existed who would it be? Why?
Jesus, because that would be cool to be the only person on earth to really know what Jesus looked and sounded like before everyone else walking the earth right now!
30- What was the meanest thing you ever did as a little kid?
Me and my childhood bff used to give tourist the wrong directions on purpose during our summers in DC. Hahahahahaha!

aaaaaaaaaaand 31- What have you learned about love?
It’s unpredictable and you can't control it no matter how much you try to. Love can make you feel on top of the world or 100 feet under it. Love just happens. There are different types of love and all of them are pretty darn great most the time!

Howdy

2011-07-21T19:05:00.001-05:00

Today has been one of those days. I am not really feeling myself. It's a phase, it will pass. On most days I am pretty comfortable in my skin...today is not one of those days *shrug* I looked at myself in a patients mirror as I waited for them to finish using the restroom and wanted to cry. I didn't. After I blog this I am gonna pep up and "Just Dance" till my body says stop.

My very last patient gave me a compliment that helped me feel a tad better. As I was finishing our session her PA (physician's assistant) came in and asked them how they were doing. The patient instructed the PA to look at me. The PA did and repeated the question. To which the patient said "didn't looking at her make you feel better? She always makes me feel better". I had to smile. I knew that compliment was from God, don't ask how, just knew.

But anywho....

My 31st birthday is on Monday! I was planning a trip to the beach but I have changed my mind. There are a couple of lakes much closer that I can sit out in the shade and just process my thoughts. Watching flowing water helps me clear my mind and reset.

I was thinking that for my birthday on my blog I would bring back the "Ask Anything" post. No one that I usually read, when I do read blogs, has done one in awhile so I am doing it! So from now through Sunday night I will take all questions. If my lurkers or anyone else wants to email the question vs. posting it on my blog my email is lanique57@hotmail.com. Early Monday morning I will hopefully throw up my Happy Birthday to me post and answer any questions I may or may not get. If I get more than 4 questions (3 plus 1) I will make myself be satisfied, but 31 questions would be AWESOME! I already have the title...31 years and 31 answers! LOL!

Experienced Dishwasher

2011-07-18T20:08:00.001-05:00

I thought I landed that weekend aide gig...I thought wrong. *shrug* Oh well, wasn't meant for me I guess. It sounds weird, but I am not really accustomed to not getting a job that I interview for. It's reality and people get turned down all day everyday, but I don't like it and don't have to like it. The labor market hasn't rebounded as much as some folks think it has.

So I am still applying for any job I think I can do that's local and asking for weekend help. Been looking at different sites and find it funny that everyone requires experience...even for a part time dishwasher! Really? I can't apply to your establishment because I don't have experience? Well, I do have experience washing dishes in my own home, but I am pretty sure you are not talking about that! You got to be kidding me!

*eyeroll*

Lord knows I can't wait till I am a licensed PT at some point in 2013! Patience Ladynay, patience.........

1,000!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2011-07-10T21:15:00.002-05:00

This is post 1,000! Woooooooooooooo! Let's party! I love this song right now! Shuffle with me! Scroll down for an actual post, just needed to get this out the way! Fast forward about a minute and 40 seconds for the song, LOL!

999! w/edit

2011-07-10T21:05:00.004-05:00

One more to 1,000! Sweet!

Well what has been going on en mi vida? Did I say that right? Do I care? LOL!

I started acute care in a local hospital on Tuesday and after 4 days it feels like I have been working there for months! So far I've learned that I'm pretty sure I don't want to be a pediatric PT because working one day in the NICU broke my heart and for the first 1/2 hour I was scared to touch any of the premies or sick babies.

I've dealt with some interesting characters and patients, had all sorts of body fluids on me, and had someone code on me Friday. He came back 4 mins later and as far as I know he is still with us. I'll find out tomorrow. I am almost certain that before my 2 months is over I will witness someone cross over. Most definitely will happen by the end of my third clinical rotation at a skilled nursing facility.

I was talking to Snookums earlier and described to him that everyday so far has been like an episode of ER, except that day I spent in the NICU. My clinical instructor promised me that this past week was not a typical week. Tomorrow we start week 2 *deep inhale and exhale* All in all. I like it better than outpatient work thus far.

I have been out of work for a week and have been applying EVERYWHERE! I looked on a website and saw a posting by a woman with a disability that needs weekend help. She was looking for someone with experience, knew how to transfer, and had a vehicle, among other little things. I fit what she was looking for to a tee so I shot her an email telling her I was a PT student and pretty much fit the description. At the end I mentioned Pooka and if I was considered for the job my only request is that I'd be able to bring her with me. She emailed me back saying cool and that she wanted to meet me to interview Monday. She called me today and gave me the details. I'm going to ride by there after work tomorrow and see if we are a good fit. I hope so. I feel so odd not working (for compensation).

I wonder what I will encounter tomorrow. I have no idea what impairments she has or what her diagnosis is. From the way things are described I am pretty sure she either doesn't have legs or use of them. Her speech is very slow and incomprehensible at times and I'm thinking it will be easier to understand her face to face. She sounds young, but the location is in a complex for the elderly. Again, I wonder what she looks like and what her current condition is. Hopefully this is a great match. This set up is wayyyyyyyy better than the group home gig. With the group home the hours are set, you clock in, you clock out. With one on one it's more flexible and you are only responsible for the care of one person. Plus I can bring Pooka! Only drawback is the payment portion which hopefully won't be an issue if we click tomorrow. We shall see.

So I meet the author of the ad I responded to. She is my age and has Freidreich's Ataxia which is sort of like Muscular Dystrophy. I met the girls sister, who is like the person that takes care of the hiring/firing etc and one of her evening aides. The interview was really laid back. The only thing I had to do was show them I could transfer her from her manual chair to her electric and back! I could do that with my eyes closed and actually ended up showing her current evening aide a better way to do it that would save her back :-) They loved me and the conversation quickly turned to what I will be doing, when I need to come observe how she likes things done, where I can park, what my hours are going to be like, where Pooka could go if she got bored in the apt...basically talking like I had the job already so even though my call regarding the final decision will come on Friday I am sure I landed the job. When I walked out with the sister, the sister told me that I pretty much had the job if I wanted it. I won't put all my eggs in a basket till I get the confirmation call from the lady that needs the aide on Friday. It doesn't pay a whole lot, but it's flexible, related to my career, and I can bring my child! Can't ask for much better than that. I am grateful.

Went to see Cirque du Soleil - Algeria yesterday. LOVED IT! I want to see the other shows more than ever now!

This is my birthday month so during each of the 5 full weekends I will be doing something to celebrate. First weekend was a wine tasting, second weekend was Cirque du Soleil, next weekend I am having a small get together for a game night, the weekend after that I would love to go to the beach and look out into the water and don't know about the last weekend of the month just yet.

I'm in love!

2011-07-02T09:08:00.000-05:00

Yesterday after my official last day of the state job I went to a wine tasting/trivia night at a winery. Sampled a few types and found that I really like one in particular called Hateras Red or something like that :) Maybe one day I will learn about wines *shrug*
After the trivia night I was invited to play this...

and

At first I declined because it was already late but I changed my mind and OMG I'm glad I did! I know that people have been playing these games forever already and I am always the last to catch on to stuff, but MAN! These games are sooooooo fun! It's like DDR with your hands! We played JD2 for about and hour and the MJ Experience for about a half hour. I was sweating big time and my arms were feeling the burn! I'm in love! I am going to go buy them today after I go see Cars 2!

YAY!

Should I be ig'nant?

2011-06-30T11:47:00.000-05:00

So I am on fb during lunch and I see a wall post from my cousin who owes me some money from the Prince concert. The post states the following:

"I so want to go see Chris Tucker on July 16!!! Who's with me?"

My first reaction was to respond and say something like..."Me! Only if you're paying" that way she'd get the hidden message without putting her on blast to everyone else.

Then part of me said to leave it alone.

Hmmmmmmmmmm

2 thumbs pointed my way

2011-06-29T12:34:00.005-05:00

Who is going to have a free lunch and dinner tomorrow?

Who is going to have leftover dinner for lunch Friday?

Who is going to see Cars 2 this weekend *I'm borrowing Lsbnmom's son*?

Who is getting a brand new fridge care of my landlords?

Who earned 2 and a fraction of a day of vacation time that's going to be paid in my last check?

Who is blogger allowing to post with one click again?

YAY!

It's the little things.

She set me up!

2011-06-28T15:23:00.002-05:00

My administrator and manager called a meeting to disscuss legislative changes. At the end of the meeting my administrator asked if anyone had questions or concerns. Nobody spoke. She asked if anyone had some good news. Nobody spoke. Bad news. Noboby spoke. Then she says...

Ladynay, don't you have some news to share? Then of course everyone in the room looks at me.

"Nope!"

"Do you want me to tell them or do you want to do it?" asks my administrator

*sigh* "You set me up so I don't have much of a choice" as I laugh it off. Then I tell them Friday is going to be my last day.

It wasn't supposed to go down like that. My plan was to randomly disappear. I told her that when I sat in her office last week. I specifically told her not to say anything. She said she wouldn't. So I guess she figured if she was gonna keep her word she'd set me up so I would have to say it and not her.

She set me up! ROFL!

6/25/05 = when this relationship started

2011-06-25T10:36:00.001-05:00

I actually remember the day I started my blog. I was in my night clothes laying on the floor with my laptop getting frustrated at the fact that all the names I wanted to use were taken already. I finally found one that was available, titled my first entry "The beginning of a beautiful relationship" or something like that, and the rest is history. Six years and 994 blogs entries later I am still going at it! WOW!

I remember a time when I used to blog everyday. It would be the first thing I did in the morning at the state job or when I got home that night. There would be some days I would blog two or three times in a day! I was addicted. Then Trent started doing audio shows that I couldn't listen to at work so I'd get up an extra hour early just to hear his latest show. WOW! I still love me some Trent but not get up even earlier love anymore, LOL!

I was curious to know who was the first person to comment on my blog was that still commented now. Technically it was Teezie, but she don't count because I've known TZ since the 90's, wayyyyyy before I started this blog in '05. For the first year the only folks that commented were folks that knew me already or spam! LOL!

Turns out on 2/2/06 I got a comment from the one and only, paper ripper extraordinaire.....JAMEIL! The one that is about to get married in less than a week....to RASHAN!!!!! *so so so so excited* What? You didn't know? Now you do!

I would give her a prize but since I'm sending a wedding gift I'm just gonna mesh the meanings behind the gift, ROFL!

I want to thank everyone for reading, commenting and following me throughout this blog of mine. I blog for me, but it's much more fun when you have comments to read. I have met some really great people from blogging so far and I'm curious to know how many more I will meet before my last blog entry.

You guys ROCK!

Now for a few notes on last nights concert....

-Keisha Cole should never sing "I'm going down"

-KC out performed Marsha A. *sigh* and the Pied Piper put them both to shame

-MA's set was only 30 mins and 10 of those was spent singing and dancing to other peoples music. She didn't even sing her latest track! WTH?

-The sound crew and KC's wardrobe people need to be fired, ASAP!

-Kells got some very, very, very, very nice lips. I have a crush on his lips, yep, just his lips. MMMMMMMMM

-The show was okay, but overall I was disappointed

FN squirrel

2011-06-24T17:33:00.002-05:00

I have lived in this apartment since 2003 or 2004. I live in an area where there is a lot of wildlife. We have the regular stuff like squirrels, deer, and bunnies...and we have stuff due to the lakes near by like various bird life, snakes, turtles, etc. There is even a red fox den in the back of my complex. You can see them roaming if you get up early enough. They cool. You give them a once over while they give you a once over and every species

That's all fine and dandy. I don't mind the wildlife...as long as it's OUTSIDE!!!!!!

*animal control showed up, netted the squirrel and left less than a minute after he showed up*

Oh so yeah where was I.....I came home yesterday and saw baby rabbits by my door. They are cute. I tried to upload the pic but blogger is tripping.

Then today I come home in a rush to get showered and out the door since I am going to the R Kelly concert tonight. I say hello to my baby kits that are hopping all the place today then go inside. I go in my kitchen and see a bushy tail, a body, and some ears on top of my back door blinds! I should have taken a photo for you to understand but it's too late now, LOL!

A fn squirrel was in my home! How in the WORLD!?!?!?!?!

I called animal control then sat on my couch to keep an eye on my pet squirrel. To kill time I posted on fb and started this blog entry. Gomer Pile came by and took him out. YAY! All hail Raleigh Animal Control!!!!

Now to go wash my butt and go see Ar-rah Kelly, Keisha Cole and Marsha Ambrousiousisondpnepavjdnvpae (I don't know to spell her last name) LOL!

Oh Crap

2011-06-23T12:13:00.005-05:00

The neuro module is officially behind me. That's good.

I start my acute care rotation on July 5th. That's good.

I start my skilled nursing facility rotation in September. That's good.

My days to work in the acute care setting are M-F.....so are my days at the SNF.....

Meaning no days during the week to work the state job.....

Meaning next week could be my last week at the state job....

I haven't been called to work the group home gig in awhile so I basically consider myself as not being employed there.

The loan money I took out could last if I did some serious budgeting.

If I don't find a job quick I may be jobless....

I am never jobless....

ever.....

Oh crap....

I shot off three resumes for some night gigs that I don't care for just now.

I just had "the talk" with my administrator. She said "as bad as I hate to lose you, I know you need to start your career, we both knew the day was going to come" then gave me a hug. It SUCKED to have to tell her that I am leaving...for good....*sigh*

What am I going to do?

YAY!

2011-06-21T15:33:00.001-05:00

Passed Neuroscience!

On to Management of Neurological disorders final on Thursday!

*insert high spirited dance here* :-)

Positive Energy

2011-06-20T11:04:00.004-05:00

Tomorrow, Friday June 21, 2011 something extremely important is going to happen. I will be starting my Neuroscience final exam! It's been a crazy 16 weeks I can tell you that for sure! Neuroscience is the class that I had to recruit a tutor for. So if you have a moment, ask God to bring all this material to the forefront of my memory and to guide me as I take this 103 question exam. If you don't do the God thing, send positive energy/vibes this way. I'm so serious. I have been studying hard all weekend with breaks here and there and this morning I was in a classroom writing and drawing all over the whiteboards from 5am till our review session with the professor from 9-11. All of that and I STILL haven't gone over all the material yet! *sigh*

So Tuesday is the Neuroscience final. Wednesday we have "off" to study for the Management of Neuro. disorders final then...FREEDOM!!!!!!! My confidence in the management class is high so I am not concerned too much about that final as I am the neuroscience, but send a prayer for me too around 9am Thursday. It couldn't hurt! :-)

Welp! Off to study more neuroscience!

Ciao!

Venting

2011-06-08T11:21:00.002-05:00

Glad yall liked the title of my last post! LOL!

Pardon me while I vent...you don't have to read this, I just need to get this out my system to stay upbeat....

Dearest cousin,

I love you. We are blood and nothing will change that.

However.......

When you wanted to go see Prince in March with us, but didn't have the money to buy the ticket due to you not getting paid at the end of the month. I offered to spot you. No problem. I didn't mind. On the night of the show Party Girl drove her truck, her SO supplied the plant life that you took part in (I don't smoke), and I brought tickets...one would think when we stopped at the ATM so someone could get cash for the $10 parking you'd be the one to get out the truck. But no, you looked at me. I was irritated, but whatever. I got out. But soon as we get inside the coliseum you go and by a $12 meal? Really? Okay...

At the very end of March you moved so I understood you was a little short. Moving is pricey.

No problem.

End of April comes by and you had some unexpected expenses. It happens. I understand.

No problem.

End of May rolls around. I hate hounding people for money but I needed my $$$ back to do some things. Party Girl and her SO paid me back for their tix in April. I shot you a msg last week once I saw you had plans to hangout in Charlotte this passed weekend for one of your friends birthday. (Gotta love fb sometimes). When I got the msg back saying you got me when you get back on Sunday I was okay with that. Thankfully I got a couple of people that will let me hold something when times get tight round my side of the woods. So my need turned to a want. I want my $$$. I wan't my $$$. You have had 3 pay periods. THREE! I want my $$$ I know I can't stand when people count my money, so I am not gonna count yours. But I will say that I am sure that between those 3 checks you got since the concert I could have gotten my money back. I'm just saying.

So when I shoot you a msg yesterday when I know and see on fb (gotta love fb sometimes) that you are back from your weekend with your friends. I don't want to hear about the "minor set back" you had or that I'll get it Sunday if you can get hold of your mom. It is possible that your friends paid your way during your trip. I've gone on a few trips with a little more than lint in my pocket, so yeah, I know it's possible you didn't spend much or anything at all. But at this point I don't care. I want my $$$. Period!

It's too hot to be irritating folks Miss! I am very nice and patient more often then not with most people, but my niceness and patience is thinning towards you. Quickly!

Mark my word. End of June comes and I don't see my money. I will have no choice but to solidify a stereotype for you.

I want my $$$$$!

Give it to me raw!

2011-06-06T18:15:00.002-05:00

Last week I was lazy. I didn't feel like cooking anything and my budget is on lock at the moment so going out or getting something delivered was out the question. So me and the kiddo basically had a ton of raw fruits and veggies all last week....

AND I FEEL FANTASTIC!

No seriously, I can noticeably tell an increase in my energy levels and the scale is going in the right direction too (prolly cuz all the extra time spent in the restroom, TMI)! All in just one week! I'm excited! I ate what we had, not paying attention to portions or none of that! Fan-flipping-tastic!

Since Pooka will be with her dad for the summer starting this coming weekend. I have decided that the next time I go to the grocery store I am spending more time in the produce section and may just take me a trip to the farmers market :-) I am going to do the mostly raw foods deal! YAY!

I also applied for a 4 hour a night, 5 days a week job cleaning job at that purple and gold gym where people who pick things up and put them down aren't allowed. LOL! I filled out the app online. I don't think I will get the job, but since I plan on giving them 30 bucks so I can hang out there most days over the summer anyways, it would be sweet if they paid me! LOL!

This time next year for my 32nd birthday I plan to get on a plane and leave the US...and not need a seat beat extender! Watch me!

I love my career choice

2011-05-25T10:44:00.004-05:00

So for pass/fail seminar class I had to go learn about something indirectly related to PT. I chose orthotics and prosthetics. This morning I went and hung out at a local foot center. I mean ANY type of person that does work with feet were in that building...from a podiatrist to a pedicurist! The place was nice and everyone I met was very sweet.

So I go in, get the tour, meet the staff, play with some machines, and all that good stuff. I end my observation walking around with the podiatrist and the chick that makes custom prosthetics and orthotics (there is a name for her but I don't recall it at the moment). We are parlaying back and forth and I am feeling kinda smart because I am holding up my end of the conversation with ease. Then the podiatrist asked when I graduated because their current physical therapist is moving on to another facility soon. I told him and he looked sad and said that I seemed to really know my stuff and that they could really use someone like me there. *collar pop* I wish I was done with school and done with my board exam! UGH!!!!!! Him and the lady gave me their cards and told me if I needed to use them as a reference or needed them for anything to call or email them! They just met me! I wasn't there very long and they were just offering stuff left and right! LOVE IT!

Now that's what I call favor!!!!!!!

*feeling really good right about now*

Hola!

2011-05-17T17:39:00.005-05:00

How do you foreign characters on your keyboard. Like the upside down exclamation point the Hispanic population uses. Where is that?

Class started at 10:30 today.

From 8:30-10 I was getting it in at the gym. This year I'm making good of my tuition money!

Can't wait to fit back into my sexier clothes.

Wale came to Elon. I didn't feel like driving back to campus. Gas is getting cheaper here, but still wasn't cheap enough for me to make the extra trip. Still kinda impressed Elon wanted him to perform.

Took my 2nd out of 3 test for my Neuroscience course yesterday. Gotta B. Going to buy my tutor some chocolate milk. She.LOVES.chocolate.milk. so this isn't a weird reward for her.

One month till Pooka's off to daddyland. Part of me doesn't want her to go.

Gave the locs a good wash and acv rinse this weekend. As I was taking care of the new growth I saw my first grey hair. I am sure there are more, but this was the first one I've seen.

Don't know why I'm soo excited about a water battle going on this weekend.

Don't know why I like that Booty Work song by T Pain and company. I would love it even more if it was just an instrumental.

Yesterday Pooka came home, ate dinner, finished her homework then went straight to bed...in my bed...slap dab in the middle of it. She must have had a tough day because I've never seen her fall asleep so fast! LOL!

Had my car since 2/2008 (I think) and something has finally broken on it. I have this lock mechanism on my shifter and it broke. Looking at forums it's a common problem. They won't do a recall because it's not a safety hazard. Basically what happens is do to wear and tear the piece that allows you to take you car out of park breaks (it's plastic in a lot of Dodge/Chryslers) and whenever it decides to pop you can't take your car out of park. Fun! It happened to me on Thursday (I think, my days run together so it could have been Tuesday) of last week. I went to school, parked, attended my classes, hopped in the car to go home, turned the car on, then couldn't get the car out of park. Long story short that was a long and stressful evening. There is a manual bypass that will unlock the shifter, but it's a temporary fix. I got the part (metal, not plastic) now I am looking for someone to swap the piece out. My classmate's husband works for the Chrysler dealership, but his company will not let him swap that one piece out. They want him to swap the whole mechanism out. *sigh* Whatever. I have the instructions on how to do it so if I don't find a solution soon I will switch it myself. I can be a Ms. Fix It when I need to be! *brushing shoulders off* LOL!

On Mother's Day I called/texted/emailed/fb'ed/etc... all the mothers I knew of. This included Pooka's paternal grandmother. She texted me back saying she was glad I texted because she had lost all her contacts. She moves a lot so I asked her for her address so I could send her photos of Pooka. Babydaddy and his mother do NOT get along well so I feel like it's on me to make sure Pooka has a connection to her paternal grandma till Pooka is old enough to keep up with her on her own (if she wishes to do so). Photos were sent and I got a call confirming receipt. During this phone call she asked out of NOWHERE "When are you and Babydaddy getting back together?"

*long silence*

"We separated in 2004, it's 2011". I wasn't trying to be rude, but that's what came out my mouth, LOL! She is an interesting character. That's all I'm going to say about that.

That will be all.

Happy Mother's Day!!!!!!

2011-05-08T10:28:00.003-05:00

OMG it's almost noon and I'm still in the bed! YESSSSSSSSSSSSS! LOL

Happy Mother's Day to all the mommas out there. An extra special shout out to the single parents, and a super special shout out to my single dads wearing both hats! Hugs and love for all of you!

My Momma's Day started at 8:30. A bunch of texts between 8:30 and 8:45 woke me up, I got a call from my mom and not even 5 secs after hanging up with her I got a call from my father! *gasp* He was never on my favorite people list, but he has been placed lower than he already was with me. It's not my story to tell but I will say he has lost his ever loving mind! *exhale*

Anywho, got some msgs and calls. Sent some emails/texts/fb msgs to all the momma's I knew of and started to smell bacon. I open my bedroom door to see what's up and I am commanded to stay in my room. I do what I'm told and after a bit of waiting I am served breakfast in bed! YAY! For breakfast I had some cinnamon raisin oatmeal fresh out the microwave, bacon and eggs pipping hot from the griddle, piece of toast w/2 jelly packets, and a glass of OJ! Woot woot! *insert stir that soup dance* I was told that cereal will be for lunch! :-D I love my child, I swear I do!

My day will consist of doing absolutely nothing! Well, I will do Pooka's hair later on, but that's about it! *insert Bruno Marz Lazy Song here*

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ups and Downs

2011-04-30T09:02:00.004-05:00

Downs:
-the zipper busted on my favorite jeans this week. Like I needed a reminder of my weight. *sigh* I have been taking advantage of the gym access we have at school so I'm still in the process of "the get right plan". Can't wait to see some real results!

-since coming of Depo my hormones have been everywhere, no need to go into details but let's just say my body is still having a hard time reaching homeostasis :-(

Ups:
-Pooka and I went to see WWE Raw when it came to Raleigh last week. I have added Randy Orton to my "he could get it list". I've seen him on tv plenty of times and had no reaction, but when he came out on Monday I was like "hellllllllllllllo nurse!" LOL! Maybe it was the sleeves...maybe it was the facial hair...maybe it's part of the hormone roller coaster I mentioned earlier...I don't know, I just know he was looking delicious! LOL!

-my tutor is AMAZING! Since I've been talking things through with her and focusing my time on neuro (great for me, sucks for my SO and friends) my grades have sky rocketed back to where I am accustomed to them being! We have 2 weekly quizzes every Friday. This past Friday I only got ONE wrong total! *stir that soup dance here*

-work hard play hard. Since I've been getting it in on the academic level lately this weekend is dedicated to play! Tonight I am going to Elon to party with some classmates. Two of my classmates decided to start a relationship last year. Today is the females birthday. The guy planned a surprise party for her at his house. He's gonna take her out and do all the typical birthday stuff then when they get back to his place our class plus some extra folks are going to be there! She is gonna cry and it's gonna be awesome! Mark my words, they will be engaged before we graduate! Tomorrow I'm going to spend some time with my local crew and play cards. I haven't seen or spoke to that crew in awhile due to my focus elsewhere, so I'm excited to catch back up with them.

-Monday I'm back on the grind. Week 9 of 16! Over half way done with neuro! Now that I'm actually starting to understand the material and put pieces together I like it! The human body is an amazing unit!

-Pooka tests for her next TKD belt today. She's excited, so am I. Maybe I'll add a clip of her doing her thing when we get home.

Tween

2011-04-20T16:19:00.005-05:00

Per Wikipedia, a tween is preadolescence, that is, the stage between middle childhood and adolescence in human development, in the range of 9 to 12 years old.

That's where my Pooka is, and where her father just realized she was! LOL!

I got a call at work yesterday. The middle of the conversation went something like this...

BD: Pooka has hair
Me: Uhhhh yeah
BD: I'm talking about body hair
Me: *chuckle* Mmmm hmmm
BD: Ladynay, she has hair under her arms and and and...down there!
Me: *trying to hold my laughter* I told you last year remember?
BD: It was just a little bit.
Me: A little bit LAST YEAR...it just wasn't gonna stay fuzz yah know
BD: *silent*
Me: *just to mess with him* You do know what's coming right? The body hair, eating changes, moody behavior...
BD: Stop!
Me: *no longer holding my laughter* What? It's gonna happen sooner than later. She'll be 10 in a few months.
BD: Hopefully she'll be with you when that goes down.
Me: It could happen this summer.
BD: Stop it.
Me: It could happen this week.
BD: Stop.
Me: *laughing* I'm just saying.
BD: Stop.
Me: You are going to have to deal with this DAD! *reburst of laughter*
BD: *sigh* Not right now.

That conversation was hilarious! His little angel is growing up! LOL! It's a tough pill for him to swallow. I must admit, I haven't fully digested my own pill yet. But I have accepted the fact and have had all talks the needed to be had at this point with Pooka. The birth control talk will come once her system gets going.

I wonder what BD is going to be like when she starts having real boyfriends! ROFL!

Winning!

2011-04-14T14:06:00.005-05:00

Thanks for the positive comments on my last entry! :-) Okay, so I took my Management of Neuro stuff exam this morning... and ACED IT!!!! *sigh of relief* I feel better. I start up with my tutor for Neuroscience next week. Faith in myself is being restored. I was depressed for about 2 days. Public apologies to those that were around me when I was dealing with that grade. I just don't straight up fail anything. I may not do as well as I liked, but never flat out fail. We got out of class early early today and the chick that carpools with me has another hour and 20 minutes of class. So I am in the library about to knock 2 assignments out then take a power nap in the lab. What? There are treatment tables, pillows, and sheets down there! LOL! Tomorrow after class I will be picking Pooka up from school and getting on 85/95N! I am dropping her off at her dad's....FOR A WEEK!!!!!!! Praise HIM! LOL! I love my child with my entire being and will no doubt miss her...but I'm ready for "our" spring break. I will still have school, work, and the same ole other stuff. But I won't have to be active mommy for an entire week! YAY! This will give her dad and his main girlfriend a taste of what the summer is gonna be like. Did I mention on my blog that the plan is for her to stay with them this summer? Oh yeah, uh huh, that's right! Almost 3 months of doing my own thing! I will be on my 2nd clinical rotation but still! No mommy responsibilities! I have a feeling she won't last the whole summer up there, but whatever. Any break is a good break in my opinion! Winter time is when big/large/fat/plus sized/etc...folks shine. Folks wanna wrap themselves up at night in your extra insulation and stuff. At least that's what I thought! After I aced my test me and some classmates went to a local deli for lunch and I got asked out! Wow really? I declined, but it was nice. I'm not the sterotypical dime piece that gets dinner offers all day every day so I was flattered. Between my boyfriend being extra mushy and that random strangers kind words...I am kinda feeling myself, LOL! It won't last long but I'll enjoy the feeling while it lasts! LOL! Okay, it's time to catch up on blogs!

Failing

2011-04-11T19:28:00.003-05:00

I started the infamous Neuro module on a high note! Knocked my first 2 weekly quizzes out the BOX!

Then it was all down hill from there.

I am in a super deep hole right now.

I am not used to this academic unsuccess. Unsuccess is not a word but I'm using it anyway!

I put out a public plea for a tutor.

This sucks.

That will be all.

Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa :-(

Monster Jam!!!!!!

2011-04-02T19:55:00.004-05:00

Yep! It's that time of year for Monster Jam to run through Raleigh and just like last year Pooka and I were up in the spot! :) This time I scooped my nephew, Lsbnmom's son, up for the trip. He loves trucks and Spiderman is his favorite super hero so when I saw that the Spider Man monster truck was going to be in the show I just had to take him! Both kids had a ball and I had a good time again. It's not too many places where the kids are strongly encouraged to make as much noise as they can! LOL! Pooka's favorite truck is still Grave Digger. Grave Digger did this high air wheelie over some cars and ended up like this...

As you can see, the driver is okay and out of the truck. I had such a good time! Seeing the kids have fun made it even better. :-)

Other than that things are okay. Tonight and tomorrow will be dedicated to the brain. On my last 2 tests I did not do so hot. Not hot at all. I must refocus, failing is not an option!

VCU lost, I'm sad. That's the teaching university my mom had her knee surgery. They did a great job on my mom. I was rooting for their bball team. :-( Oh well.

Next outing is WWE Monday night Raw, April 25! Woot woot! Then Buy your ticket for Alegría in Raleigh, NC and my girl Sade both in July just in time for my birthday!

Me + @Box Office + Pay Check = Never a good combination! ROFL!

PRINCE!!!!!

2011-03-28T20:45:00.004-05:00

Went to the show on Saturday with Party Girl, her SO, and my cousin. In one word the show was.....AMAZING!!!!!!!! Point blank period. Even if you are not Prince's number 1 fan you would have had a ball at his show! On fb I called it an experience, not a concert! My one and only regret was not trying harder to find a way to buy the more expensive tickets! I don't have a camera phone so I stole this pic from my cousin's fb page, LOL!

That symbol stage changed all kinds of colors and had all sorts of patterns in it throughout the show! Fabulous!

I swear Prince defines entertainment! I hate to use the overused word swag, but man o man if Prince don't have masculine swag (in heels and a gold sequin outfit at that) I don't know who does! My goodness! And his little legs are all muscle baby! Them quads were showing off! LOL!

Chaka Khan was his opening act and she did great as well and honnnnnnnnnnnney, sista girl is looking good you hear me?

I had a wonder time and I highly suggest that if you hear about him coming to a town near you GO!!!! Even the pricey tickets are worth every penny!

That will be all!

Week 3

2011-03-21T18:43:00.002-05:00

I have started my 3rd of 16 weeks into my neuro module. So far so good. This module is basically everything you can think of about the brain and spinal cord. I was scared at first but I got a 19/20 on my first weekly quiz and so far I have managed to stay on top of my game. I submitted 2 assigments today that are due Friday, just about finished a presentation I'm giving on the 31st, and got 4 pages of a 10 page paper due during week 15 drafted. WOOT WOOT! My plan is to get it written, have the chick that carpools with me to red pen it before she goes off to her intership (she is an awesome writer/editor), correct it, have the writing center look at it, and turn it in. My goal is to have it turned in by the end of April if not sooner. I love this feeling! Progress is addicting! Rumor is the module gets harder as the weeks pass so I want to get the small stuff out the way so I can focus on the material.

Enough of that. On Saturday I am going to see PRINCE!!!! I'm excited! I am not a huge fan, but he is a legend and I want to see him in concert while I can! Chaka Khan is opening for him which is an great bonus. Two legends in one night! Can't beat that! After the concert I am going to take a power nap then drive up to my mom an 'em house. My childhood best friend is coming home from London with her son/my nephew so I need to make my way up there to see them. I am coming home Sunday. Crazy? Yeah, but if she can come from London, I can drive 8-10hours round trip from NC :-)

I am debating if I should take Pooka and my other nephew (Lsbnmom's son) to see the Monster Jam show (big loud trucks doing tricks and crushing cars). I blogged about how fun it was when me and Pooka went awhile ago. Pooka is anxious to go again. We'll see.

I was super proud of myself this weekend. I brought a wireless printer and router, hooked them up, and had everything involved working perfectly! This is a big deal for me because I SUCK at tech stuff! Badly. LOL! I didn't have any help from my tech geek boyfriend or tech geek fam! Yay me!

Other than that. Life is good. I definitely got it easy compared to what others are going through right now and I am sincerely greatful!

ARGal Style

2011-03-04T19:56:00.004-05:00

Today I spent all day doing NOTHING! Last day at the clinic was last Friday, school starts back up on Monday, worked 4 10's at the state job, Pooka went to school, gas too darn high to drive around.....so I spent the day playing on the internet. One of my fb friends posted a video call Lemme Smang It and it was soooo funny I looked them up. Turned out this group of folks put out a bunch of videos. I love them all, but here is one of my favs! Enjoy!

This one is for Mr. Deaky. They get off beat but the point is still there! LOL

Newborns and Rollerskates

2011-02-20T08:48:00.009-05:00

Yesterday I went roller skating...OMG! I didn't fall thank God, but I did get a fabulous workout. I didn't go around a lot, but the few times I did had me sweating! LOL! It was kind of difficult for me to dodge the falling kids in front of me as I was getting my stride and going slow makes it hard to balance! I had plans to take pix and video of Pooka and I getting it in, but I left the camera in the car and after I dropped SIXTEEN DOLLARSSSSSS for me and Pooka to get in I saw the sign on the exit door saying that I'd have to pay again to re-enter. So yeah, no pix or funny video of me on roller skates. Pooka can skate! I never seen her skate before. She goes from time to time with her summer camps so that's where she learned. She has a slow but steady rhythm. She didn't fall either :-) Yay us!

Rewind to Friday afternoon. I got a call on my cell from an unknown Raleigh number. I called the number back and it was K-digga. K-digga is the chick that used to live with me way back when and calls me every blue moon to say hello. So I ask her what's up and she said "I was just calling to let you know I had the baby on February 9th"

*record scratch*

See as long as I've known K-digga she has always claimed to be pregnant. Always, without fail. So when she told me she was pregnant the last time I spoke with her. I gave my "oh okay" type response and kept it moving. I heard the baby stirring in the background and my jaw just about fell off my body! So I ask the typical stuff (name *which is a female version of the daddys name with a lot of letters*, height, weight, etc) and make arrangements to come see this little boy after Pooka and I go skating. I asked her why they didn't make the boy a junior. She said the medical folks told her it was a girl so they picked a girl name and since he came out so pretty they decided to keep the name. Poor baby, the only folks that will know his gov't name when he gets older is his family, girlfriends, and employers, LOL!

So Saturday comes, we skate and now arrive at K-digga's aunt place (1br apt where her, her fiance, and aunt stay). Pooka and I bring a box of pampers and wipes cuz that's a baby staple and go in. The baby is ADORABLE!!!!!! Point blank period. I meet her fiance who didn't quite look like I thought he would. He looks Native American and black, stands about 4 ft 6 and is about 120 soaking wet! He is ight in the looks department outside of the clothes he was practically swimming in. LOL! It's interesting to see them together because K-digga is about 5'4ish and a big chocolate girl like me. They do make a cute couple tho' I must say. Her man was very affectionate towards her and the baby and soft spoken.

Here's a pic of my baby holding K-digga's. Pooka's lips are blue from a Ring Pop she had earlier.

We visit and catch up and my only concern is them having a support system. During our chat she mentioned that nobody has come to visit her and the baby outside of me and her brother. A friend of hers wants to visit, but is having car trouble. Neither parent works. K-digga gets a check, but it's not enough to support a family. I asked her when I could keep the baby since they lived so close and the baby is very calm. She said maybe in about 3 months so she can go look for work. I thought about asking her fiance if he was looking for work now, but that would have been stepping over the line. From what I remember from the last conversation he wasn't making an effort to handle his and that just doesn't sit well with me. I have to keep reminding myself that that is not my household and to mind my own business.

At the end of our visit I told K-digga to call me if she needed anything for the baby. Aunt Diva and some of my cousins have little boys that have stuff they will want to get rid of soon so I know I could find whatever she may need for free. My money isn't overflowing but I am sure I could piece a few dollars to get the baby a small bag of diapers if the need arises. I know what it's like to run out of diapers! When Pooka was a baby, we ran out...on Christmas Eve! It took Babydaddy awhile to find a convenience store open that actually had some! LOL!

On the way home I heard an advertisement for Drumline live coming to a local venue this coming Friday and Saturday. I hopped online ASAP to price tickets. They are reasonable so this Wednesday I will be at the box office to buy tickets. Yeah, I go to the box office when I can to save money from the high convenience fees they charge online! LOL!

Here is a promo that I found online. I am soooooooooooooo excited! Towards the core of my being is a super duper band geek and that inner band geek hasn't stopped screaming since I heard the commercial! YAY! Can't wait, can't wait, can't wait!!!!! I wish there was a career where you could make a comfortable living listening to live music all day!

Drumline Live! from Grown Folks Music on Vimeo.

A Valentine's Day to remember

2011-02-14T20:35:00.003-05:00

There I was...all dressed up in the appropriate attire...the man of the hour came in the room and the room went quiet...he came up to me making sure I didn't have any questions...then get got ready to perform...

at 7:58 am he took the scapel and made the first slice into her knee :-)

Today I witnessed a total knee replacement and it was AWESOME!!!!!!! So much better than watching TLC or Discovery Health!

I had a depressing fat girl moment earlier tho'. In their OR you have to wear scrubs that they provide. Of course that didn't have extra fat girl size so I felt like a stuffed sausage, but after the procedure got started I could have really cared less. Just another friendly reminder of why I need to keep exercising.

975 check in

2011-02-12T10:13:00.003-05:00

Hello!

Life's been pretty good. Don't really have much going on. Don't really have much of anything to say to anybody.

I've completed 6 of my 8 weeks at the clinic and I'm already sad that I'll have to go back to class on the 7th :-( I've learned sooooo much and still feel dumb. I'm going to watch an orthopaedic surgery on Monday. Chances are it's going to be a hip or knee replacement. Kinda excited about that.

Pooka is good. She is going to an overnight camp tonight so she'll be out socializing. I think I am going do some hair maintenance and some laundry. My life is soooo exciting. LOL!

They hired someone for that spot I was filling in for at the weekend job. So in my head I am done there. The state job is still kicking. When I went in Wednesday my administrator walked by my office, saw I was there and said "Oh thank God you're here" and gave me a hug. I didn't feel like working hard Wednesday, but after that I felt like I should bust my butt and give her some good numbers :-)

Aunt Diva called me yesterday to vent and mentioned that she and the guy she was dating have scaled things back a lot and threw around the fact she now had an extra ticket to the Sade concert in Baltimore! *cheese* The concert is Thursday night and it's a week before the last week of our neuro module. So I don't know if I will be able to take that Thursday and Friday off school and be okay. *sigh* Decisions decisions.

Happy Valentine's Day if you choose to celebrate it. I'll be at the clinic on Monday and may take Pooka out to dinner or something. Would love to spend some face to face time with the bf but it's not in the cards this time.

That's about it. Let me catch up on what's going on in your world.

Smile, it's the weekend!

2011-01-29T01:21:00.001-05:00

I am sleepy and quite tired of looking at a computer screen and typing crap for this midterm thing I got going on. But I just can't shut down without sharing a video someone on fb put on their wall. It was funny enough to share so have a smile and a chuckle with me! :-)

Busy Saturday

2011-01-26T15:05:00.003-05:00

Quick post.

Life's good.

Pooka's great.

State job's ight.

Weekend job ehhh, got written up for taking Pooka to one of the houses *shrug* whatever.

Lingering issue from the last post resolved *thank GOD*

Last week Saturn crossed my mind. I blogged about her about 2 years ago (one day I will learn how to hyperlink in my blog, lol) She was the one who would say Saturn funny and was friends with Leggs. You remember Legss, the chick from up north that was trying to get me to watch her son all the time. Don't remember? Oh well, I'll link that post up at another time. Anyways...Saturn crossed my mind about 2 weeks ago so I sent a text out to the number I had for her and fortunately she had the same #. We texted back and forth for a bit then fell off again. I get a text today from a new number saying that this was Saturn's new cell. Glad she crossed my mind when she did or I would not have caught up with her, lol! She asked me about me and Pooka coming to her 2nd son's 2nd b-day party Saturday. Cool! Pooka is going to be excited. I am not telling her that we are going to their house. Her first son and Pooka are the same age and used to hang out when they went to the same after school care. I can't wait either cuz the last time I saw or spoke to Saturn, she was pregnant! LOL! I don't have many local folks to hang with so hopefully I will do my part in keeping in touch with her this time around.

So Saturday is gonna be busy busy busy. I got to get my car inspected so I can renew my tag, wash clothes at the laundromat, take Pooka to test for her blue belt, take her to the Cheesecake Factory because I promised her I would, swing by Saturn's for a bit, then go to Fayetteville to hang with my cousin who is coming home on a 2 week break from Iraq! YAY!

I guess Sunday will consist of sleep, sleep and more sleep! LOL!

TMI...you've been warned!

2011-01-16T21:15:00.004-05:00

This entry is me sharing somethings that most consider too much information so I will give you a moment to click elsewhere, hit the back button, the x in the upper corner or whatever...

Still here? Okay. Well I've just got off the phone with my Snookums and I was telling him about my new addiction of sorts...with toys. Sex toys. I had a couple for awhile and recently had acquired a few more. I plan on getting another one before the week is out, but only because I burnt the one I had like it out. Don't judge me! LOL! My libido on a scale from 0-10 has been anywhere from a 5 to a 10 for the past few months (my hormones are going crazy, I'll get to that in a moment) and since my baby doesn't live down the street or with me, I have to ummmmm take matters into my own hands! LOL! There is absolutely nothing like the real thing, NOTHING. But unless I whore myself out which brings on STD's and or babies, I gotta do what I gotta do! Catching and/or dying from an STD is a huge fear of mine. OMG and having Pooka have to tell people her mom died from and STD! A nightmare!!!!!!! So yeah, I will go to the store and pay for my relief. My toys don't talk, they give me what I want when I want it, no babies, no STD's, they don't even care if I'm on my cycle! Perfect! My latest, and so far favorite toy is *cue music*

The Hit.achi Mag.ic Wand. I normally don't do that break up with period thing but I don't want the traffic of those looking it up on a search engine! LOL! Did I say this thing was my favorite? If not, it's my favorite. Yep, my favorite. Favorite! LOL! At first I couldn't handle it, but now, it's my bitch! LOL! The great thing about this is it's original purpose is to be a massager. You can buy it at Wally world or any other store. The added bonus is that there are attachments to this bad boy. The wonderful, wonderful, wonderful attachments. HAHAHAHA! Did I mention this thing plugs into the wall? Tee hee hee! I swear it will take you anywhere you want to go fast!

A couple of years ago I used to follow a blog of a chick that was obsessed with her wand. I now know why! I have no clue why I wasn't curious enough to buy one before when she ranted an raved about it. *shrug* Oh well, I have one now! I highly recommend it whether you have access to human dick or not! *cheese*

Okay now the other TMI stuff. If you are a man I would suggest you stop reading at this point. I am going to talk about aunt Flo. :-)

I'll give you a moment.

Okay.

After I had Pooka I started getting that lovely shot that you get every 3 months. Got on it with no side effects and my period disappeared. Wonderful. Well I got my last shot around April (I think) of 2010 for no reason other than I wanted to stop. I knew I would gain weight *sigh* and it would take awhile for my body to get that stuff out of my system. I was on it for over 9 years so I knew it would be awhile. Fast forward to 1/1/11. I finally get a cycle! YAY! I'd been waiting for it. Good news right? WRONG! I've been bleeding ever since! Today is day 16! Last night I was reading forums about the side effects of coming off depo! OMG! Had I known then what I know now I would have never ever got on it! My symptoms are nothing compared to what some other women are going or have been through. One woman said that she was on her period for a year! A YEAR! I pray to God the few symptoms I do have will go away sooner than later. I have the bleeding and all that comes with that, increased fatigue, weight gain and hormones running wild. Which explains my recent increase in # of sex toys. I already take iron due to my touch of anemia so not to concerned about my iron loss. But I really wish my hormones will balance out and I can go back to the Ladynay I was pre shots that had a cycle like clockwork.

I want my body back!

My name is Bennett...

2011-01-13T19:38:00.002-05:00

...and I ain't in it! Thank God!

Lunch time comes around and I check my email for the photo. I didn't know dude. His face did not ring any sort of bells with me. So I called the detective up. We chit chatted. This detective works cold cases and when they reopen a case they have to interview everyone mentioned in that file. The dude they were looking for was in the file. With some back and forth it was determined that the dude must have lived in my apt and continued to use the address after he moved. This guy has been using my address since 98. I moved here in 03.

Conversation lasted 2-3 minutes at the most and that was that. No info was asked for and I was told that I would not be contacted by them again.

So that's how the story ends!

I'm a snitch!

2011-01-12T18:08:00.004-05:00

Today was a great day at the clinic. It opened late due to icy early am conditions and had patients back to back. The day went by quickly.

When the day was I hopped in my car and checked my cell phone. Had to messages. One from my mother and one from a detective from Charlotte.

*pause*

The detective addressed me by name and ask for me to call him back when I got the msg. I did so. Turns out that he is looking for someone whose names I don't recognize and a physical description of nobody I know. I was asked some questions and was told that him and his partner came to my home, then to my job. They said they explained to my employer that I wasn't in any type of trouble . He wanted to know if he emailed me a photo of the guy they are looking for if I'd look at it and see if I knew him. I agreed. I am supposed to get the email tomorrow morning and call the detective back to talk about it.

*pause*

Needless to say after the phone call I freaked out. Don't really know why but soon as I hung up I called my baby. Snookums listened to me freak out with my mind going 100 mph and made a great suggestion. I hung up from him and called my manager at the state job. I was curious about which job they went to. It wasn't the state job as far as my manager knows.

I am still kinda bugging. What if I look at this picture tomorrow and I actually know this guy! I would faint. I would also snitch! How did the detective know pretty much everything about me? How did this dude get linked to my address? What did this dude do? This is the closest thing to the 101 police shows on TV I've been apart of! I don't like it. Not one bit.

I have my fingers crossed that I don't know this guy, talk to the detective about it and it all goes away just as fast as it came!

*sigh*

I want to be a therapist when I grow up!

2011-01-06T19:09:00.004-05:00

So tomorrow will make a week at my first clinical rotation AND I LOVE IT!!!!!!!! Granted, I am not completely comfortable with everything yet, but I was assured once I get my feet wet good I will relax more.

One of the many great things about this rotation is that I have most Wednesdays and weekends off...which means I can keep the state job and still hustle at the weekend job on Saturdays (they haven't filled that position yet) so it's GREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAT!

My first experience is at an outpatient satellite office of a small hospital. Everyone knows everyone and everyone is just as country as ever! The clinic is small and super friendly. I am so freakin' excited! Today I was given my own patient and was added to the system and had my patient scheduled under me. Hehehehehe my patient. HA!!!!! My CI, clinical instructor, called me over to look at it on the computer. I think I pulled my schedule up a million times and just stared at it like an idiot! LOL

My CI is an overweight, non Caucasian female!!!! *insert hallelujah chorus* I had a talk with her about being "non typical" and she gave me some insight on what it's like to be "atypical" in our field and it made me feel sooooooooooooooo much better about a lot of things. I just feel so on top of the world right now. It was just a great day at the clinic. I can not wait for the day that people will actually pay me to do this job! It already saddens me that I will have to go back to campus in 8 weeks.

I know everyday will not be like today, but today, at this moment and time, I know for sure that I made the correct career choice!

YAY!

Christmas and all that jazz

2010-12-25T20:37:00.005-05:00

Santa was good to me this year. I got my standard underwear and winter stuff (gloves, hat, scarf, etc...), then I got 2 shirts and 2 pair of khakis for my upcoming clinical. It's not a lot but it's all needed. Again, Santa was good to me.

I've been pretty good with the eating thing. My personal trainer emailed me and I sorta kinda lied about my exercising while on vacation. I didn't have to, I should have been real but I wasn't.

I didn't spend Christmas morning with Pooka. Her dad came and scooped her up the night before. He is keeping her till next Sunday. Do you know what that means? A week of child freedom!!!!! Will I go crazy? No. I am at work now. Will work 1/2 tomorrow and then go meet the people I will be "working" with for the next 8 weeks @ the hospital & get my badge (I am soooo nervous), then working the state job on Thursday. Friday will be spent going through Pooka's stuff tossing everything she can't wear or doesn't play with anymore Goodwill's way. Other than that I will be killing it on the trail and working out with the trainer. I will probably be alone when the new year begins if I don't find somewhere to go, but I am okay with that.

My trip to MD was okay. The day after Christmas I was sick, very sick. It was to the point where I was vomiting air! I.HATE.THAT! There was nothing left to exit my body! Stuff was coming out of everywhere it was able to ALL.DAMN.DAY! Ugh! Of course one of my friends that lives in LA was in town and wanted to see me that day. She was sweet considering I felt like crap when she stopped through for a sec. I am glad I got to see her.

Babydaddy made me mad, but what else is new. He had the nerve to call me the day after Christmas asking if I packed Pooka's suitcase and talking about how Pooka didn't pack any long sleeved shirts. My reply..."no and okay". I was just waiting for him to ask me to buy some. I had my response mentally ready for him. He was quiet for a second and then he changed the subject! LOL! I think he has a new girlfriend. It's not the main one (who he now lives with), the married one, the other white one, or the black one. This one is new and she has a truck. He also lost his job. I thought I published the blog about the phone call I got a couple of weeks ago with him talking about him moving and starting a new job. He wanted me to open an account for Pooka at XYZ bank so he could have a fraction of his checks go in it and now that he's sharing bills and what not with the main gf he should be able to help more. I knew it wasn't gonna pan out just by his history so I didn't bother opening the account. His gf's love Pooka so I am sure she will eat well and have a good time while spending the week with her father.

On 12/24 my grandmother drunkenly asked "ain't no famous person die yet? It's the Christmas season someone famous is doing to die". Two day later Lady T was gone. What makes it scary is the last time grand diva said something like thst during Christmas time James Brown died Christmas day. She does this stuff with pregnancies too! She freaks me out sometimes with that stuff!

Well that's about it. Happy Early New Years!!!!!

Merry Christmas!!!

2010-12-21T17:14:00.002-05:00

I am about 15 mins away from jumping off the clock and onto 95N to see my momma and nem. YAY! I feel like crap but I am not letting that stop me. Hopefully traffic won't be bad and I can make it there in 4 hours. *fingers crossed* Since I'm not sure what my internet communicaton will be like, I will go ahead and wish everyone a Merry Christmas, Happy Holiday, or Merry/Happy Saturday, how ever you get down.

Travel safe out there folks!

Tomorrow-Destination 12/9/2012, Day 1

2010-12-19T23:20:00.005-05:00

I have a personal trainer in place to kick my butt...

I have the knowledge to properly take care of my health...

All the crap has been removed from my kitchen...

I have a closet full of the cutest clothes that I can't fit into anymore that's the extra mojo to do it...for real...

Ladies and gentleman as of 12am, 12/20/2010, Destination 12/9/2012 will be launched.

On 12/10/2012 Destination Hawaii Spring 2013 will jump off.

Stay tuned!

I'm a fan

2010-12-12T00:58:00.002-05:00

So I am at the weekend gig watching BET awards for the first time this year and during the Anita Baker tribute there was this lady playing the piano and singing with KEM. Her voice struck me.

"Who is that?" I said curiously to my coworker.

"Rachelle Ferrell" she replied.

"Never heard of her"

"Girl where you been? She sings that song with Will Downing *starts singing Nothing Has Ever Felt Like This*"

"Don't know what you're talking about"

She then breaks out Pandora on her cell phone and formally introduces me to Ms. Ferrell. She has a jazzy feel to her and a nice range.

I'm a fan.

Light at the end of the tunnel

2010-12-09T18:29:00.005-05:00

I've been up to the same things. School, work, masterb...umm relieve stress, spend time w/Pooka, sleep, repeat.

I've been exercising. My muscles are sore but I don't care! I am going hard core (yet again) with my physical health. Screw waiting till January to get serious! So many reasons why I need to get this excess off of me!

One reason being my very first clinical experience starting January 3rd! So scary, yet so exciting! This will be the first real test to see how much I've learned in the almost 12 months I've been in PT school. I can't believe that I am almost done my first year! Everyone says "if you can survive the first year you can finish the program" YAY! My last class of the orthopaedic module is upper body (shoulder, elbow, wrist, hand). My grades haven't been too great till yesterday. We had a pop quiz yesterday and I got 100% (booyah) then we had our elbow exam today and I got a 87% (double booyah)!!!!! Next week is our last week on campus!!!!!!!!! All I have left is a practical exam (hour long PT session where we treat a patient with an upper body issue from shaking their hand and introducing yourself to setting up their next appointment), written exam, technique exam (professor gives you 2 interventions to perform and they critique/grade your technique), and present some research I've been working on! That's it! Soooooo excited!

Here is a pic of me taken on Wednesday. It was freezing so I broke out one of my winter coats. Everyone kept making comments on how cute they thought I looked and one on my classmates insisted on getting a photo! LOL! It's funny. We are so used to looking at each other in sports bra's, shorts, tee shirts, and/or sweat pants we appreciate and love to see each other in real clothes! LOL! Posting this photo is 2 fold cuz I am also using it as some of my "before" photos *cheese*

Now back to staring into that light down there!

Itis

2010-11-26T17:54:00.004-05:00

Well Turkey Day has come an gone and for the last 24 hrs. I have been in pretty much like the photo above. Chillin, in the cut, bout to fall asleep from the itis! My Turkey Day was typical. Enjoyed hanging with the fam. Not as many showed up as usual but we still managed to have a good time. I took pix but they didn't come out like wanted then my batteries died out. *shrug* Oh well.

Today I did manage to house hop locally and pick up some yummy goodness from friends. Later tonight I am picking up one of my classmates from the airport and taking her home...then house hopping there for more yummy goodness! Tomorrow I am walking the trail, promise! LOL! While getting the mail today I saw my neighbor setting up her Christmas decorations! I feel compelled to put some up too. I think it's the competitive part of me driving this compulsion! LOL! Good thing we need some toilet paper cuz that gives me good reason to pick up a few decorations...and my $3 chopper...and maybe my $10 coffee maker. What????

EDIT: $15 and 15 mins later Pooka and I came up with this! What you don't see is that spray snow stuff on Pooka's bedroom window and on my living room window. We win the competition only I know about! YAY ME! LOL!

The Christmas season can not officially start in my home without this song right here so here it is!

Happy early Turkey Day!

2010-11-24T08:27:00.006-05:00

I am feeling real good right now...

I don't have to drive to the family party tomorrow. All I got to do is come off some gas money that wasn't asked for.

The weekend gig direct deposited my check today. Went ahead and renewed my AAA membership. You know the lock out queen gotta keep that membership current! LOL

This new body wash I used this morning smells Grrrrrrrrrrrrreat!

The weather is nice.

I have learned that I need to be patient. The best things in life are worth waiting for.

I am loved.

I have a big ole family that has each others back when the going gets tough. My kid is a blessing. I have no baby daddy drama.

I am not 100% pleased with my physical appearance but I woke up this morning so I have another chance to fix it.

My friends are simply amazing! I love the closest ones to me dearly.

Love the bf. Times get hard between us every now and again and during the hard times we just want to throw the towel in, but he has that something that I can't or won't let go of :-)

Uh! This just in!!!! The state job just sent out an email talking about come and eat! Gotta go! Let the nom nom nomin' begin!!!!!!!

Everyone travel safely and try not to eat too much! *hugs*

Another reason I love the fall

2010-11-21T19:24:00.002-05:00

It's not only deer season, it's big people season! YAY! What do I mean? I mean that tis' the season that people ditch their beach bodied boo's that they've been toting on their arms all spring and summer long and calling up people like me! You know. The chick/dude with the extra insulation that they wanna cuddle up to late at night. The big teddy bear brotha's and BBW's. IT'S OUR TIME TO SHINE BABAYYYYYYYY! It's officially here!

Had flirty dude at the grocery store say nice things...

Had a great conversation with Snookums where he was being extra (loved it)...

A person from my past hit me up out the blue and said that back in the day I was his "guilty pleasure" Wow! That's a new one for me, but I like it! LOL!

Big people are back in style! YAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!

Don't feel bad all my slender, slim, less than thick brothers and sisters. When the weather breaks again in the spring, they will ditch me with my chili and hot chocolate and come crawling back to you with your fruit salad and slushie. It's the way it works! HAHAHAHAHA!

Quick and Random

2010-11-17T19:18:00.003-05:00

I ate wayyyyyyyyyyyyy too much food today. Not the binging for self punishment like last week, but borderline Thanksgiving type too much. Ugh!

Not going to post Pooka's art up here because what she did was took her government name and did some pretty cool things with it.

A guy that works at the grocery store I frequent asked me out. He jokes with everyone all the time so I don't know if he was serious or not. I just laughed. He laughed too. That means he was playing right? I don't like hurting folks feelings so I hope he was playing.

The second year PT student that rides with me 3 days a week didn't give me any gas money. I didn't ask for any, but when she asked if she could start riding with me she said she'd give me x amount per week.

Lsbnmom has a nice house. It puts me back into "I wanna house" mode. It will fade. It always does.

I feel like I am supposed to be doing something but I don't know what.

Today during lunch I went to the grocery store (different one from above) and they had Pooka's favorite yogurt on clearance. They had to sale in a week so they slashed the prices big time. I brought them all because I knew Pooka would crush them in no time. When I picked Pooka up from afterschool she saw the bag full of her yogurt and kirked out! Her face lit up in a way that tickled me to the point of tears! I couldn't reproduce that reaction if I tried! LOL! After I got myself together I put my seatbelt on and just as I was about to put the car in drive I hear from the back seat....

"you are gonna put that I made you laugh on facebook aren't you?"

After 2 seconds of shock I burst out into yet another fit of laughter! That is my sign to take a fb break! LOL!

Pooka is awesome

2010-11-15T21:39:00.003-05:00

Not sure if I blogged about this or not but my "egg" was one of a few students selected from her school to have her artwork displayed at the NC State Fair. We were very excited and I was very proud.

Now for the remainder of November that piece of work will be posted up in a local bank! YAY! It may seem very small but it has given my child such a boost in confidence and healthy pride in her work! :-)

Now if I can get her to work numbers like she does a colored pencil we'd be in business! LOL!

Ladynay<---proud momma!

Focus

2010-11-14T01:29:00.004-05:00

I don't have any focus at all.

Haven't made much sense lately. To myself and others.

Made a lot of poor choices.

Lost a lot of motivation.

Gained alot of negative energy and emotions.

Want to lock myself in a room all alone for a long period of time.

Feeling all over the place.

I'm selfish and in need of A LOT of attention right now.

I want what I want when I want it and I'm not getting it so I feel like throwing a full out grown folk tantrum!

Being this way isn't very appealing but it's the way it is.

People suck!

And now for a musical selection (like ARgal be doing)

Where did "O" and SouthernGirl go?

2010-11-03T10:59:00.001-05:00

Over here ----> http://damnbloggerfordeletingmyblog.blogspot.com/

Carry on.

Twin

2010-10-29T12:50:00.003-05:00

***as I'm browsing the dollar store, a chick talking to a blue tooth touches my arm***

Random shopper chick: Excuse me, did you date a guy named Nick?

Me: *wondering why she is touching me* No.

Chick: You sure?

Me: *laugh a little* Yeah, I'm sure.

Chick: Nick *insert last name*

Me: I don't know him, sorry.

Chick: Oh, I'm sorry. You look just like someone.

Me: *laughs a bit harder* It's cool, have a nice day.

We part ways and as we are walking I ask myself why it took a few confirmations for her to believe I did not date this Nick character. I over heard her asking whomever was on the other end of her call the name of the chick that used to date Nick.

"You know the dark skinned girl with the dreads...No not her, the other one"

LOL! I guess I gotta twin out there somewhere! :-)

Procrastination

2010-10-27T19:52:00.002-05:00

So I am supposed to be studying for my last 2 exams this week....and I'm on U toob. *sigh*

I don't have anything to say other than I want to be at a house party with lots of good drinks, good food, and dancing right about now!

Dance with me as I continue to waste time :-)

Random

2010-10-23T22:26:00.002-05:00

I'm at work trying to avoid studying for the 4 tests in 4 days I got coming Tues-Fri.

My left foot is asleep.

My coworker insists that the TV stays on TruTV as he does his school work in another room.

My cousin has started to transition into her apartment. I was starting to want to sleep in my bed sans Pooka so the transition came at a good time. I let her keep the key just in case either one of us got into a situation where her having access to my home or someone nearby having a spare key would be beneficial.

My check came on Friday at 6:28pm. I am not used to getting my check this late, but at least it has been coming consistently.

After work this morning I went to the Super Mart of Wal to pick up some groceries. I parked the car, opened my door, and put my left foot out when my phone went off. As I sent a reply text I apparently put my car keys down in the cup holder. *eyeroll* I hit send, got out the car, locked then closed the door. *sigh* Thank God for Triple A! Definitely worth the money! This makes the fiddy leventh time I've locked myself out the car! I told my cousin about what happened once I got home and she told me that her Honda does not allow you to lock yourself out. You can only lock the car from the outside! The next time I am on the hunt for another vehicle I will be aiming for a vehicle with this feature for sure! LOL

I would like to learn about various beers. A few of my classmates are serious beer drinkers. They have long conversations about this kind of beer and that kind of beer. If you can't find it in the grocery store, I know nothing about it! HA!

Speaking of drinks. I am trying very hard not to become a daily coffee drinker. Normally I will have a taste for coffee, drink it for about a week then go a few months without it. The vacation time between coffee cravings are getting shorter and shorter. There has to be a better drink (outside of water) to get attached too!

The state fair is here. I was excited at first, but now not so much. I was going to take Pooka Sunday after I worked the states vendor booth, but Pooka decided that she'd rather go to the country with my step mom. I was surprised when she told me, but taking her to the country was cheaper than taking her to the fair so I was all for a change of plans! LOL

Dear Cleaning Guy,

2010-10-18T16:26:00.002-05:00

Sorry I haven't used the trash bin in my office today, but thanks for checking. As you walked away I got a whiff of you. Smells like you just left your girl's house. I hope it was good. I'm not mad at you. I don't blame her for wanting some short, dark, shiny bald chocolate before you had to come in. That's what's up. I couldn't tell you to your face that your smell entertained me well after you walked out, so I put it out there the only other way I knew how.

See you the next time I come in,
Ladynay

Hello, Good morning.

2010-10-08T11:05:00.005-05:00

Blog! Yeah, I have one of those! LOL!

What's been going on my side of town? Nothing new really.

My cousin has found a place and will start to transition into it next week. Her new place has a washer/dryer set up already so guess who gets the set she has in storage? MEEEEEEEEE! I will kind of miss having a room mate (in a weird way) but I know she would like to have most of her belongings in one place and have a space to call her own. She is moving less than 10 miles away from me so it's not like she is going far. Smells like another local babysitter from time to time! Yippee!

Tonight me and a handful of classmates are having a girls night out. My pregnant classmate has been told to lay low and be stress free till the baby comes (due this month) so she has been bored out of her mind at home. We figured we'd try to hang out as much as we can before she is on 24/7 mommy duty. We are having Greek for dinner and going to see "Whatever it Takes" or whatever that movie is called. It's some chick flick with Fergie's husband in it. LOL! Pooka is coming with us and is very excited. I am just glad to be getting out the house. Studying all the time sucks!

Was supposed to meet with another blogger in the NC area this weekend, but my job called and wanted to know if I could work. Being that I am very broke right now (no food at the crib, 1/4 tank of gas, some bills haven't been paid type broke) I need to try my hardest to work every hour offered to me! *sigh* Again, one day soon I won't have to go this crap!

In other news, I am a hairy beast. Sad but true. So in an effort to degorilla my face I used this:

I followed the directions, placed the strip on my chin....and all hell broke loose. I guess I must have sensitive skin because it took no time for my face to react badly! *sigh* My skin is healing well, but the flaking scabs freeing themselves during class time makes me feel like a reptile! Ugh! I don't want to use anymore razors on my face because I don't like the results. Years ago I tried the Nair face cream and broke out so I left creams alone. I just want the hair gone before I wake up with a goatee!

School is school. Work is work. It feel like the harder I work, the less money I have. Today is a pay day but I can't be confident that my check will be in the mail when I get home this afternoon. Thankfully my classmates are treating or else I wouldn't be going out tonight. They are great! :-)

One day I will have an exciting personal life again. I have to remember that the sacrifices I am making today will provide a comfortable living for me and those around me in the long run.

I need a hug, a money tree, and a lose a million pounds quick treatment that won't hurt my body ASAP!

Till next time!

Range of emotions in less than 24 hrs

2010-09-24T17:10:00.005-05:00

Yesterday, 11 p.m. woke up from an hour "power nap". Thought it was Friday morning. Wipe drool from page I was using as a pillow and finish studying. Felt awake and ready to go!

3 a.m. stop studying and go to bed.

5 a.m. get up, do the morning thing.

9 a.m. take the last of 3 finals for my spine/TMJ section of class. Felt good.

11:30. leave campus. Plan to pick up check from mailbox, deposit it, then go to state job. Felt confident.

12:30. find no mail in mailbox. Was okay, the latest the mail comes is around 1:30ish. No prob.

1:30. still no mail. Felt a little irritable.

2:30. still no mail. Was bout to go off on the USPS. They messed up my $ game 2 weeks ago with this crap!

3 p.m. make it to state job. Was going to stay home but sitting at home babysitting the mailbox was making me more mad by the minute. 2 hours is better than 0 hours right?

4:50 p.m. check final grade posted online for spine course. Got an 83 on the dot. 82s and below have to take the course over next year. Glory! *insert praise dance*

5 p.m. leave state job. If the powers that be worked in my favor I could go home where my check would be and get to the bank and cash it before the bank closed at 5:30. I don't live far from the state job. Felt hopeful.

5:24 p.m. deposit check. Postal service better be lucky because I already started drafting a letter in my head. Felt a lot better.

5:45 p.m. pick up Pooka and pick up a few groceries. Felt back to normal.

6ish. Pooka offers to cook the spaghetti for dinner. I brown the beef and tell her to have at it! :-) Felt loved.

6:15 p.m. Get on FB and see a wall posting from my classmate stating that she was freaking out because we will have to treat real patients in 3 months. THREE MONTHS! Why did she have to bring that to my attention????? 3 months is no time! OMG! In the beginning of January 2011 real people, with real pain will come to the hospital that I will be "working", tell me that their xyz hurts...and I have to make it better! Holy Crap!!!! Felt and still like I have been hit by a bus! This is real. I am going to be out there doing my thing with real people in pain. Real people!!!! When you mess up practicing with your classmates it's all good. There is no "oops!" with real people! OMG!

In 3 months I need to get my dental issues taken care of (I have a tooth missing in the front), and lose a million pounds! I have a ton of nice "clinic attire" but I can't wear most of it!

OMG!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

WTH??????

2010-09-20T18:35:00.006-05:00

Okay, it's 5:19 p.m. I am at my desk at the state job getting set up to leave and my cell phone starts to vibrate. It's an Raleigh area number that I don't recognize but I pick up anyway.

"Hello"

"Ladynay?"

"May I ask who's calling?"

"Hey girl it K-Digga!"

Okay. For those that have been following the blog. K-Digga and Whitebrotha came to live with me many, many years ago. I blogged all about that situation. Mess! So anyways, about a year or so ago K-Digga called me out the blue like she did today to basically update me on what was going on with her (leaving WB, moving to Raleigh, etc...) I had called her back a little after that and the number was disconnected so I hadn't heard from her since...till today.

After a few OMG's I asked her how she was doing. She says she's 5 months pregnant. Now those who remember my K-digga entries you know that she is always "pregnant". So I laugh on the inside and ask her the typical baby questions (due date, morning sickness, blah blah blah) she tells me everything and then I ask her if it was by the dude she was seeing when she called me a year or so ago.

"Nah"

I pause. "I KNOW it ain't WB!"

She laughs hard "Nah, you know he moved to VA right?"

"What in the world is he doing in VA?"

"He is engaged to that girl he got the baby with."

*record scratch*

I am silently in shock for a good while.

"Ladynay, you there?"

"ARE YOU SERIOUS?????????" finally comes out my mouth.

K-Digga is laughing "Oh you didn't know huh?"

I look at the clock, ask KD if this was a good number to hit her back on when I got home and hung up. Soon as I fed Pooka I called the number back to finish this conversation.

See. I don't know if I ever blogged about Whitebrotha's baby momma or not because all the mess me and her went through blew up and settled before I even started to blog. Very long story shorter. Keep in mind that this summary happened over the course of a couple of years so if I tell this story over again in the future I may leave stuff out or mention something not mentioned in this entry. Mmmmmmmmmmkay, great!

I was dating Babydaddy. Whitebrotha, one of Babydaddy's boys, was dating...what should I call her...ummm That Girl. Okay. The four of us used to hang out a lot. That Girl loses her place and moves in with Babydaddy and I. Do I even have to type what happens? LOL! Babydaddy and That Girl started sexing on the side. That Girl also had a few other side dishes. That Girl gets pregnant. She tells WB, Babydaddy, and the other side dishes that they the daddy (Maury! Maury! Maury!) they've all been up in that recently so they all believe that they the daddy. She and I are preggo at the same time, but she is due before me. That Girl tells me one evening that Babydaddy was her son's father. I get mad.

I leave the house to take a very long walk. During this walk all the pieces to the shit I been noticing but kept quiet about fell into place. I get back and she is still there. Babydaddy is now in the living room. We have a very "interesting conversation". I was soo mad I was super calm (if I am so mad I am super calm or start crying, run) By the end of this "talk" there was a hole in the wall (c/o Babydaddy) and I had slid my engagement ring across the table towards her and told her she could have it, Babydaddy, the apartment, and all the other shit that came with it! Looking back I wish this was on tape somewhere! LOL!

This happened on a Tuesday night. Wednesday morning comes and That Girl is no where to be found. Turns out she left all her belongings in the apartment, hopped on a Greyhound bus, and went to her families house in VA. Been there ever since. How about she told her family that she was afraid for her life because I had threatened to kill her and the baby. (BS! I never said or even stating anything close to that) Anywho. I tell Whitebrotha. Whitebrotha pretty much didn't care because the relationship was abusive (she was beating him) and was getting uglier by the day. The end of their relationship was BAD. Somehow him and Babydaddy remained cool.

There was/is this website that new mom's use to order more hospital pix of the baby. After I heard her son was born I hopped online to see him. Soon as I saw him I knew it was WB's. It didn't look like Babydaddy or the other men I knew of that could have been the father. I told them all where to find the picture so they could look for themselves. I know it took BD a long time before he looked it up. Whitebrotha went st8 into "it ain't mine" mode. LOL! Don't know about the other dudes.

When Babydaddy and I finally ended, Babydaddy moved to DC. After awhile he found That Girl trying to get back up in and he met the kid. Babydaddy called me that night and told me that he was now 100% sure the boy wasn't his and that he looked just like WB! Duh! I told his butt that years ago when the baby was born!*smh* He also said that That Girl wanted WB to terminate his parental rights. She also said that she had had a nervous breakdown and doesn't remember anything about that night before she left NC. (BS) There are a ton of details left out but that's a pretty decent summary.

So I call K-digga back and she basically said that late last year while her and WB were married *eyeroll* Babydaddy had came down and gave WB That Girl's number per That Girl's request. Apparently she wanted her son to start a relationship with WB. Badda bing badda boom WB is now living with and engaged to That Girl. We chit chat about other things and hung up. I immediately called Babydaddy and asked if he knew his old homeboy was living in VA now and was engaged to That Girl. He didn't want to believe me! LOL! He knew that WB was building a relationship with his son and was coming to VA to see him from time to time, but didn't know he moved there and put a ring on it! LOL! He, like I, thought it was crazy considering how their relationship ended years ago. But oh well. Not our problem. I hope BD get's invited to the wedding so BD can take pix and send them to me! HA!

K-Digga told me that she saw a current pic of their son on WB's facebook page by way of a girl her and WB were cool with and saw how WB had been talking smack online about her. K-Digga doesn't have a fb page *sigh*. I had never thought to look up anybody from that realm of my life till tonight. After we hung up I looked them up and of course they both have their photos set to private. :-( Their wall is public and they are the typical mushy bout to be married couple *gag* The nosey part of me reallllllly wants to see what their son is looking like now. Like I said, the only picture I've seen was the hospital pic 9 years ago.

That Girl looks the same. Very pretty for a backstabbing s.o.b.! LOL! WB's profile pic is him playing golf. When the heck did he start playing golf? LOL! Part of me wants to friend WB so I can see the pics but I don't want That Girl snoopin' round my fb page. LOL!

One thing K-Digga said to me tonight that I thought was sweet was that her living with me those few months taught her that if she wanted something, she had to get off her tookus and get it! She also stated that she admired the way I've always been able to hold my own and considered me one of the few strong, black women she knows. Wow! It's hard to believe someone who lies quite often, but it was still pretty nice to hear!

Just Wright

2010-09-18T22:43:00.002-05:00

is movie about a black, plus sized PT that gets Common in the end! It's possibly the story of my life! *fingers crossed* Too bad I've never seen the movie and heard it SUCKED!

sigh big girl to big girl....

2010-09-16T21:48:00.005-05:00

Dear confident big girl:

I love that you are feeling sexy and bold enough to make a video of yourself showing how you feel inside. I am not sure if your intentions were to be on You Tube or on my friends facebook page, but you are and I feel compelled to talk to you. Big girl to big girl.

1. If you are going to film or take pics that you wouldn't want your boss to see...leave your face out of it. Shoot, even if you gotta an SO and you sending them a lil something something still leave your face out or blocked. Relationships end and people will do things to embarrass you when they mad at you.

2. If you're going to to the sexy underwear thing. Make sure everything matches. Even if you couldn't find a set that fit right (Ashley Stewart and Catherine's will hook you up), put something together that at least looks like it could be a set. At the very least you could have had the bra and panties matching!

3. If you are going to record yourself. Have your hair right. It don't have to be a fancy style. Your hair is short enough to grab a hand full of brown gel, slick it all back, and be decent for your video. That attempt at a ponytail was sad luv. This is especially important if you were doing this for a boo. People (esp. men) are very visual creatures and if the purpose was to entice you have to have your visual display on point. Top to bottom.

4. If you was just bored and wanted to see what you looked like dancing that's cool. But next time after you tape it. Watch it. Then erase it. If you don't, you could end up on You Tube!

I am not hating on you sister. I know how it gets sometimes. Really I do. It's just that as big girls we have to flaunt our sexy a little bit different than our smaller framed sisters. Now send me your email address so I can send you some Ashley Stewart coupons.

Your sister in buffet line,
Ladynay

A Pooka moment

2010-09-14T19:55:00.003-05:00

My check that I was supposed to have Friday came in the mail today! Yay! It was post marked on the 9th which is correct because they always cut and mail the checks Thursday and I get it Friday. So the problem was with the postal service. Booooooooooooo!

Anywho, since I didn't have much food in the kitchen my cousin offered to buy dinner for the 3 of us tonight and gave me some $$$ to put in my gas tank. Awwwwwwwwwwww! I put on facebook that I was upset about not getting my check in the mail and I didn't bother to think that she had access to that message. Oh well. I am thankful to have a full belly *belch* LOL!

Speaking of facebook...I looked up someone that I used to blog about and saw their fb stuff. Part of me wants to befriend them just so I can be nosey. It's horrible I know!

But let me get back to the original post title. So tonight my cousin, Pooka, and I eat dinner, finish, and Pooka goes to my room to read. She is supposed to read for at least 20 minutes every night. She has a reading log where she writes down the name of the book, what page she started on, what page she finished on, and how many minutes she read. Next to the minutes block is an area for the parent/gaurdian to sign off on it. Okay. So after dinner me and my cousin have a long talk about various life things. It was really nice to sit and chill with her. She has been here since mid to late July and with our schedules we don't really see each other much which is cool, but sucks at the same time. As we are at the table just chatting it up Pooka comes in with her notebook open to her reading log for me to sign. Why did she write that she read from page 1 to 117 in 25 minutes!!!!! I looked at her and said "I'm not signing that" and she gives me this "why" look. I repeat myself and told her to go back, really read, and put the right numbers down because I didn't believe what she wrote was real. She went back in the room and I started laughing. I shared with my cousin what happened and we both had a great laugh about it and talked about all the stupid stuff we tried to get away with when we were younger and swore up and down we were getting over on our parents! LOL!

My cousin and I talk somemore and about 15-20 minutes later Pooka reemerges with the same notebook opened to the same page. I glance down to see what she changed in her log and this chick erased 117 and put down 156!!!! My cousin looked at the book and we both fell out laughing again! Pooka still to this moment doesn't understand why we were laughing so hard at her log! HA! I told her to change the 156 to 20 and I would sign it. So she did.

I love my child!

Glass half full

2010-09-10T18:17:00.002-05:00

I have not been blogging much and when I do I don't say much. Just know that I am ---> <--- this close to taking a fuckitol pill and throwing my hands up. I am getting a wee bit tired of trying to stay sane.

Today I went to my mailbox and my weekly check was not there like it usually is on Friday. I have less than a quarter tank of gas and had plans to attend a baby shower, 2 birthday parties and to go on campus to study some techniques. All that has been thrown in the trash.

I want to cry, but it won't do me no good.

Next blog entry will be positive.

Dear Ms. Blogger

2010-09-03T23:42:00.004-05:00

I am chilling at Lsbnmom's watching the rugrats while she is getting much needed time away from her normal routine. I have vowed to not study anything today and catch up on ALL my leisure internet activity. I did not take me too long to catch up *sigh* At the moment I am sitting here wishing Snookums was around chilling with me :-( Saw him online but he was busy and neither one of us had too much to say. I need a Snookums hug in my life right now *sigh* Every video and picture I see reminds me of him or something he'd get a kick out of...like this

Not sure what to do. Guess I'll just wrap up in my comforter nice and tight and try to take my butt to bed.

-Missing someone important

It has only been 2 weeks

2010-08-30T18:28:00.002-05:00

and school is kicking my butt!!! Seriously. I don't even know how to step my game up any higher. Most people in my life are feeling neglected and I refuse to cut my personal sanity time any shorter. I drove to MD this past weekend and the trip didn't help like I thought it would. Pooka went to Kings Dominion Amusement Park for the first time while I tried to get right mentally. That was her father's birthday present. She turned 9 on the 27th. She had so much fun she is STILL talking about it! LOL!

Blah blah blah vent vent vent. Later.

I am awesome!

2010-08-24T01:12:00.006-05:00

Tonight I taught myself how to box braid. Pooka starts school on Wednesday and I wanted her to rock some box braids, but I couldn't afford to send her to a shop. I already know how to braid and do rows so I figured I'd experiment with Pooka's head tonight and see what came out of it. This is the result:

3 packs of hair for 99 cent/pack + 6 hours of my time = huge savings!

I am so proud of myself!

Scattered

2010-08-18T12:51:00.002-05:00

Everything in my life is scattered. Mostly my thoughts. I am doing my best to maintain my normal self. Been going to bed at various times if at all. I want to just exist in a room, all alone, for a day...or week. I am all over the place. I don't like it. I need a hug. Those around me are going through so much worse. I'm praying for them. Yep, I have it easy in comparison.

Vacation is over :-(

2010-08-09T12:31:00.003-05:00

For the most part anyways :-(. Right now I am blogging from the state job, which I have not done in a good long while. Since this is my last week of academic freedom I am putting in a full 40 here this week. Not fond of the work, but the check will be lovely and definitely needed.

To break down my last 2 weeks would take one very long entry or several entries neither of which I want to do so I will summarize what I been up to these past couple weeks.

Had a birthday party at my place on the 25th! Good friends and good times! I am fortunate to have wonderful people in my life.

On the 26th my father's fam, Pooka, and I spent a week at the beach. The view from my ocean view room was amazing! Despite me being a fire sign (LEO) I love being around water. An added plus was the daily thunderstorms. The sound of a quiet storm mixed with the sound of the ocean waves crashing was just to good to be true! We did a little bit of shopping, the kids hit the pool everyday, and I got into a hot tub for the very first time...LOVED IT! I told Pooka when she buys me a house it has to have a hot tub in it! LOL! The room I was in was like a condo so we brought food to save $$$. I still made use of the bar and restaurant where we stayed. The food was reasonably priced if you went during certain hours. The drinks were ok and the bartender hooked me up with a free shot that tasted like skittles. Yum! Surprisingly enough my father was on pretty good behavior during our stay. I was relieved!

After the beach I came home, took a nap, went to work, got home, took another nap, then hit the road to see my momma and 'em. This trip was one of the worst trips I've ever made there! Normally it takes me about 4 hours from door to door. This trip took 6.5 hours! Traffic was bad in places it usually isn't and then the route I usually take in DC was blocked off for construction! This would not have been so bad if I didn't have to pee and there were detour signs around! In my frustration I called Babydaddy (I was dropping Pooka off at his place first) to find out another way I could to his place and what he told me made me cringe. He said I had to drive through downtown DC! UGH! I HATE that with a passion. When I lived in the DMV whenever I wanted to go downtown I took the bus or metro! I HATE driving through downtown DC! *sigh* So as I am slowly losing my mind I drive by every.freakin'.tourist EVER. I could really give a crap about them wanting to take pics of the sites. I just wanted a bathroom and to get out the car! Then of course Pooka chimes in that she has to go and could barely hold it. Wonderful! I was NOT going to stop in the DC chaos so I kept driving till I got to a store. Bladders get relieved, Pooka gets dropped off, I go get some fast food.

Being that I was in the DMV and not N. Raleigh I pulled out my handy dandy club.

I was aware that my key was on my other set of keys in NC, but you can manipulate the club like you want to as long as you don't lock it. I've done it before. No problem. *sigh* So I get my grub from the restaurant, hop in my car, put my food down, and try to take off the club. It wouldn't move! It was LOCKED!!!!! Oh happy day!!!!! It took everything within me no to just break down and cry. I had had enough for the day. I fiddle with it and fiddle with it and even tried to drive with it and nothing was working. The issue finally was solved by bending it with a crowbar. When I got to my moms house I was just over done! My visit with my mom and 'em went pretty good. My drive back was better, not much, but a lot less drama.

Last week I went to work and got off early to take care of odds and ends. Renewed my license and all that stuff you have to take care of during the week crap. Caught Maury on more than a few days and LOVED IT! How about I went to the bank on Thursday (I think) to get money for the weekend and the teller tells me that my account was in the negative! *scrrreeeeeeechhhhhh* She said that an amount was going to debit from my account that night but couldn't pull up what it was. We talk about what I would need to do in case someone got a hold of my account info, I put a watch on my account, and I leave. At about 12:01 am on Friday I logged onto my account to see that one of my pay checks bounced!!!!! WTH!!! Then saw that my other check that was supposed to direct deposit did not deposit!!! OMG! Soon as I got to work that Friday I called all the folks I needed to ummmm lay hands on and got my money issues in order. I just deposited the replacement check at lunch today so we will see what happens to it! This situation has never happened to me before. I am just thankful I didn't spend that money before the check cleared! Geesh!

This past Friday started my family reunion. After work I went to show face at the meet and greet cookout. It was about over by time I got there, but it was all good. Saturday morning was the family breakfast. Good food, good times. After breakfast I had to wash Pooka's uniform for her Tae Kwon Do exam that afternoon. By time I left the laundromat it was pretty much time to take her to the exam. I managed to make it with minutes to spare! YAY! She did awesome as always. From Sept-Dec she is going to take a break from Tae Kwon Do cuz mommy just can't afford it. We talked about it and she was cool with taking a break for awhile. That made me feel so much better.

When we got home from testing it was time to get ready for my family reunion banquet. This year there was a 70's theme. Pooka and I didn't have any 70's gear so we just put on whatever and went! LOL! Again, good times, good times indeed! I love my family. There isn't any group of folks like them that I know of! LOL!

We got home late Saturday night and chilled on Sunday. My house is a mess but I'll get to it eventually. At least that's what I keep telling myself. :-)

So now we are at today. It's about quarter after 2 and I would love to leave this desk and go home. But it don't work like that. I have deemed this week Hebrew slave week because I am putting in 40 at the state job and 20 at the group home. Momma got bills to pay! :-)

Guess I should do some work now.

Blogging just to blog

2010-07-23T09:39:00.012-05:00

I think I am a work-a-holic. Well, no...maybe I just like getting decent looking checks and to make that happen I need to be at somebodies job for a good amount of time.

I was supposed to work a full day at the state job today. Was kinda looking forward to the digits on that check next Friday. But Pooka came down with a tummy ache and needed to rest. Her health is more important than anything. Silver lining: if she wakes up at a decent hour (it's 11:30 and she is still out like a light) I can take her to work with me still making a few hours and the $$$ I paid to have Pooka in camp today can get applied to her care during the school year! YAY!

I don't go back to school for 3 weeks! I have a loose plan of what I will be doing! My step mothers family goes to Myrtle Beach for a week every summer. It's their tradition. They are driving there Monday and me and mine plan to meet them there the same day. My birthday party is the Sunday before so the time the party ends will determine what time we leave on Monday! LOL! I am not sure if I can be around my father for an entire week so at the moment I am thinking I may bring it on back to NC on Wednesday. We will see.

For good reason, my step mother thinks my father is cheating on her. I am not surprised. I wonder if she ever asked him why his first two marriages didn't work out. Knowing him he would have lied anyway. *shrug* My father is an asshole and doesn't deserve my step mother. I told her so. She told me that my sister (from his second marriage) told her the same thing! *sigh*.

After I get back from the beach I plan to work and spend time at the buck fiddy movie theater. There are a few movies that Pooka, Snookums, and I haven't seen that are playing so I can see a few trips there in my future. I haven't seen my mom since her surgery so I might drive up to say hi next weekend. Which will serve double purpose because Pooka's dad wants to hang out with her next weekend. Sidenote: Babydaddy stopped by my grandmothers job this week, just to say hi. Weird! LOL! When I asked him why he did that he just said he was in the area and thought it would be a nice thing to do. I don't buy that 100% but whatever.

The weekend after that is my biannual family reunion. Thankfully this year it is in Raleigh and less than 5 miles from my place! I am not really in a family reunion mode, but I paid for it so I'm going! :-)

The last week of my vacation I am planning to work a full 40hr week. With all the traveling and Pooka's next school year coming up fast I need to have my $$$ right to take care of everything. Fun stuff! One good thing is that I already had most of the stuff on Pooka's school supply list from last year! YAY!

In other news: my family and friends are not having great times in their lives. I was telling Snookums last night that I wish I could find a big, bright, pink happy pill with sparkles on it and have everyone take a piece of it. The last couple of weeks I have heard my share of Lifetime network and Discovery Health type stories and I am just about filled to capacity. It's weird because I am no where close to being a psychiatrist, psychologist, or counselor so I never have the right words to say when they drop their verbal load. All I do is provide a shoulder, a hug, say "Damn that sucks", and "I couldn't imagine what that's like". My aunt called me up last night to dump and I had to cut her short and told her that everyone has a story that sucks right about now and we all just have to pull our grown folks underwear up and do what we can to make it through. I hope she didn't get offended. I just couldn't listen to anymore stories right then. Maybe I will call her and see how things are going today. *shrug*

Since I probably will not blog again till after the birthday. I will use this part of my blog to celebrate me! :-D

This is a picture of a picture of me in the hospital...

...and this is me almost 30 years later!

I haven't loss my awesomeness or my cuteness if I do say so myself! *cheese*

Life

2010-07-19T22:32:00.003-05:00

My cuz got here a day late, but she's here. We, meaning she, talked about the situation that led her to my home. It made me mad. Not at her, but at the cause and reasoning behind it all.

Some people are idiots.

Sometimes people deserve to be tortured for long durations of time if not for the rest of their lives. Having them die is just too easy.

Karma is a bitch.

I wonder why life treats some people the way it does. I don't think it's exactly fair, but hey...who am I?

For all that my cousin has been through she is in awesome spirits. I am amazed at her strengh. I know from other situations like hers that not enough time has passed to completely heal all the wounds but at least Pooka and I can be a band aid in her life just by living our regular routines.

*sigh* Life's a bitch!

It's late....I am sleepy....Needed to get these thoughts out my head so I can sleep....Goodnight!

P.S. My cuz just opened my room door and didn't knock. I'll address that in the morning. Or maybe I'll just walk around naked in my room till she does it again. That's a more active way of relaying the message! LOL!

Roommate

2010-07-14T20:25:00.004-05:00

On Sunday I will have one. Don't know how long the duration is either. This should be interesting knowing how territorial I am.

Long story short my cousin found herself in a situation that left her homeless she asked me for help. Out of her available options I live the closest to her job. I think it's on the way to Elon, if so she may be able to ride with me some days but I am not sure. She is a PA and sometimes works those long crazy hours so that is a big maybe. I will throw the option out there after she arrives. I am going to give her Pooka's room and Pooka will have the couch, which works out well cuz Pooka knocks out on the couch a lot anyways by choice :-)

I am so glad I can help. I know what it feels like to be suddenly be homeless, despite my temporary homelessness being by choice. In hind sight that was a bold move I made that evening I decided to leave Pooka's dad, but whatever.

I am just interested in finding out how I am going to deal with a potential long term roommate. I mean...I love my mom to death, but when she was staying with me there were times I was ready for her to go somewhere. So I hope I don't get that way with my cousin. She is good people so it should take awhile for me to want my place back, LOL! The plan is for her to stay here till she finds her own place. That could be a moment. I know it took me about 2 months to get back on my feet when I was on the housing search.

We will see what happens.

15 days!

2010-07-10T09:19:00.004-05:00

I have 15 days left to enjoy my 20's! Yay! This year I am going to do a few small celebrations. With my Elon crew, there are 3 of us in the group I tend to hang with the most that have b-day's in July so we are going to dinner before we all go our separate ways during our break. On the actual day I will probably hang out with Snookums and hit our favorite pizza spot, maybe catch a movie, maybe have some folks over for a Wii tournament, don't know yet. Then I am going to the beach! I.CAN'T.WAIT! I was going to go to Atlanta to watch a childhood friend jump the broom, but I am not. I may take a random trip up to MD. I haven't seen my mother since her surgery.

Got four new, good, high mileage tires. The price hurt my feelings but I had to pony up cuz I drive 120+ miles just about daily. Going up and down the hwy with that shaky steering wheel was scary towards the end.

June was a sucky financial month for me. But with the help of loved ones I have survived it. I don't know what I would have done without them. Shout out to Snookums, LadyKat, Lsbnmom since I know they have access to this blog. Love yall!

Pooka is doing alright. Still doing her thing. She is getting taller that's for sure. She has a birthday slumber party to attend tonight. That works out well for me since I am working the group home tonight.

I hosted my first card games night last night! Normally we hang out at Lsbnmoms or LadyKats place since their homes can accommodate all of us and all our kids comfortably, but yesterday was at my house. I really enjoyed practicing my hostess skills having them hang out at my place. It was nice.

School is still school. Since we have 2 weeks left in this module we are kinda winding down with final projects and what not. We had an adult mock clinic where our professor assigned the class to groups and had people from the community she knows come in and it was our job to run screens on them and report what we find (if anything). My "patient" told me she was a developmental specialist when I taking her history. While me and my group mates where running our tests out "patient" would use words and ask us things that made us think that she was in the medical field. Turns out she was a PT! It was great in that she was able to provide us with great feedback, but sucked because since she knew what we were supposed to do. She helped us during the testing by automatically positioning herself for things when the general public doesn't know what position they should be in. Part of what we were supposed to practice is getting our patients to do what we want them to verbally and/or by demonstration. Once everything was over she told us she was a PT and she asked me if I worked in a clinic before because I did so well. That was a great compliment and it made me feel good the rest of the day.

State job is state job.

Went to the laundromat yesterday. It's been really hot lately and yesterday was no different. The whole time I was there I listened to 2 people from NY that have been here for years talk about how hot is was here and how they prefer NY weather and how the laundromats are cheaper where they used to wash in NY. After about 30 minutes of them dumping on NC I wanted to walk up to them and tell them to shut up and go back up to NY!!!! Both of them have been here long enough to know what to expect so either deal with it or make a change! Jeez! The sun isn't going anywhere and the laundromat owner probably won't change their prices and if they do it will most likely go UP! SHUT UP ALREADY!!!!!!!

Happy Belated July 4th!

Double yay!

2010-06-29T19:10:00.003-05:00

Yay 1) 6/25/10 marked my 5th year of blogging! Wow!

Yay 2) I just paid off and cut up my major credit card! If what is in my bank account can't purchase what I want I won't have it! *big cheese*

Passive

2010-06-24T13:53:00.002-05:00

Over the past few weeks the message that keeps coming to my attention is that I am not aggressive enough. My go with the flow, non confrontational personality is just not floating well these day in my ocean of life. Today I got my most recent message.

One of our assignments for school was to call another medical professional (that was role playing) about an issue we have with a patient we are treating. My scenario was to call a pharmacist and request a medicine review because my patient was consistently weak and dizzy during treatment. The list of her meds included 3 that had the side effect of dizziness and 1 that was contraindicated for the other meds that she was taking...Anywho, the medical professional role players where supposed to give us a hard time. Mine did VERY well with this. Basically his job was to get me to defend my profession and advocate for the patient. His character, like most people, think all PTs do is exercise people. Which is not the case.

Anyways....

We got feedback forms from the people we called and mine basically said that I was too passive. I needed to be more direct and aggressive.

*sigh*

If I was direct and aggressive like he was with me I would have been unprofessional! Besides, no matter how much I know, when I am working in real life I am NOT going to debate with a pharmacist about medications!!!!!!!

*sigh*

Anytime I get direct and aggresive with people they get pissed off or end up crying. It's not worth it. Besides, you are not supposed to meet attitude (professional or unprofessional) with attitude, it esculates the situation.

*sigh*

Interesting

2010-06-17T11:37:00.005-05:00

Today me and 4 classmates took about 20 Physical Therapy Aide students into the gross anatomy lab and taught them about the body. As the PTA students walked in I was looking over the donor/teacher/body my professor wanted me to use (that I usually don't work with) making sure I tagged everything I wanted to cover. My head is down looking things over and I hear a voice...

"Didn't you go to Central?" I looked up to see an old classmate from my undergrad life.

"Yeah! I remember you. Your name starts with a C or K right?"

"Yeah, I'm *insert name*"

We make a quick chit chat then me and my classmates got started. Things went really well. I actually remembered a lot more material than I thought I would considering I haven't been over some of that stuff in months! But that's not the interesting thing.

K graduated the May after I did in December. We traveled along the same circles in undergrad because we both wanted to be PT's. The interesting thing is K had the "I'm better than you" personality. She never said it out loud, but whenever we'd talk about our plans for after undergrad you could just feel her patting your head with her words. She was a nice person as a whole, it was just that part of her I didn't care for. Now here she was, visiting me, in PT school, as a PTA student. As bad as it sounds, it felt kinda good knowing that today she learned I got in somewhere and that she had to take one step down. I wanted to talk to her the way she talked to me years ago but I kept it professional. Man that sounds bad, but I am being honest.

Now don't get me wrong, PTAs to PTs are like PAs to MDs. We both do the same things for the most part job wise, it just PTs and MDs do a little more and get paid a whole lot more. Getting into a PTA program isn't a competitive process, but tuition/yr for a PTA program is cheaper and they go for 2 years vs. our 3 years.

The only thing that would have made this unexpected experience better is if it was this girl that was always one step above me in undergrad instead of K. I'd get 100% on a test and she'd get 105% due to extra credit. Stuff like that! *grrrrrr* Anywho, that chick is currently Duke's PT program. I wish her well.

Now totally unrelated...

My classmates have pretty much introduced me to a funny U toob clip every week. Today I have been introduced to the blueberry clip. Watch till the end and have a smile :-)

Why I live

2010-06-16T20:07:00.004-05:00

A few hours ago Pooka and I were watching TV. Well...she was on the couch watching TV and I was sitting on the floor, books in between my legs, working on some oh so lovely homework. Pooka got up and sat in front of me with her back against my chest (like I'm her human chair) and wrapped my arms around her. Okay she needs some physical bonding time. I could dig it.

After a few minutes she moved the books from under her bottom, turned both her legs around, placed them over my right leg and wrapped her arms around me like she was hugging me from the side. (This is kinda hard to explain but whatever) LOL

But out the blue the coolest thing happened.

She gave me a kiss on the cheek, looked me in the eye and said, "I'll always love you, no matter what."

*cheese* I needed to hear that. I know she'll feel different (temporarily) when she is older and I tell her that she can't go to a party that some boy she is into will be at, but still! LOL!

...and that is one of the reasons I live.

I should blog...

2010-06-10T20:36:00.002-05:00

though my life is pretty much the same. School, work, Pooka stuff, sleep, eat, blah blah blah, repeat.

Tomorrow is my last midterm. YAY! It really does feel like I am taking some sort of test every other day. :-(It's an open note test which isn't a good thing believe it or not.

My one and only 3 week break in the entire program starts on 7/23 or whatever date Friday lands on. After those classes are over I plan to be away from my typical life for at least one entire week. I am hoping it will be on without technology as well. We will see how that works out. I'll probably work the other 2 weeks...maybe. Thinking about this break next month is keeping me sane.

Pooka's last day of school was today! She brought home her report card and everything looked good. There is always room for improvement but I liked what I saw. That pretty word "Promotion" was at the bottom of her report card too so that means I am officially the parent of a 4th grader! YAY!

Two younger than Pooka kids moved in across the way and have become friends with Pooka. As soon as they see my car park and us come in I can almost predict when the doorbell will ring or hear a knock at my door! LOL! Normally it's all good, but today around 8:30 (Pooka always has to be in by 8, her buddies know this) one of the little girls rang the doorbell once every 5 secs till I got to the door. She asked me if Pooka could come out.

"No, she is in for the night"

"Why?"

*30 secs of crickets cuz" this question threw me off*

"Because it's her bedtime"

"I don't have a bedtime"

"That good, but Pooka does. It's starting to get dark so you should be headed home."

"What about tomorrow at 3 o'clock?"

"She won't be here then"

"Ok" and she trails off on her bike.

WTH????? 1) I don't care how old you are, don't question me about why my child can't go outside because in all honesty...I don't need a reason! 2) Why don't your too young to not have a bedtime have a bedtime? I hope and pray her parents have her come inside at a decent hour. My neighborhood
isn't bad but children their age should be inside BEFORE the street lights come on. When Pooka gets to middle school age I may change my mind. Period.

Pooka and her tae kwon do crew are slowly starting that talk on the phone thing. I have a suspicion that Pooka is not going to be much of a phone talker! LOL! This past weekend her bff (at the moment) called and cracked me up! My phone rings....

"Hello"

"Karen!"

"Ummmm who would you like to speak to?"

"Karen!"

*me thinking this kid had the wrong number* "Karen doesn't live here sweetheart"

"Pooka!"

"Oh, hi Karen. (connecting the dots) you want to talk to Pooka?" This is when I started cracking up on the inside because she is yelling names like she is a cheerleader! ROFL

"Yes"

They talk for about 2 minutes if that and that was it! Pooka is slowly moving on up in the social category. I can dig it.

I got a blast from the past voicemail the other day. It was one of those "wow they still have my number" type deals. LOL! I haven't responded to the call mostly because I don't have the time to sit and play catch up right now.

My mom got her cast off Wednesday! YAY! She can already bend her knee! Pretty darn awesome! :-)

Ummmm what else? Oh I have a mini mountain of clothes that need to be washed! So at some point this weekend I'll be at the laundromat! You sooooo wanted to know that! LOL!

That will be all. Carry on! :-)

School/Holiday wkend

2010-06-02T17:28:00.003-05:00

Rocks at the moment! I took a test before my last post and failed it...horribly (56%), thus my emotional self was down in the dumps. I was talking to a classmate and she asked me if I checked my grade on blackboard. I told her I wasn't interested since I already knew what I got (we have access to the keys after we finish the exam). Days go by and as I am checking a grade for something else I decide to take a peep at that exam grade. Why that joint say 73%???????? I thought about asking the professor about it just in case it was a typo or maybe she entered someone else's grade under my name...but I left it alone. It's bad. I know. 73 is not a good score, but I'd take it over a 56 any day! LOL!

Kicked butt on my second midterm, but it seems the whole class did well (lowest score 72%) so the test was too easy. I was talking to the second year student that carpools with me and she said expect the final to be hard. *sigh*

Took a midterm today and thus far this is the best grade I've gotten yet with this particular professor. She messed up quite a few questions so I expect them to be thrown out, which will only make my grade higher! YAY!

Tomorrow is another midterm. I feel kinda confident. I will run through the stuff I don't have down solid tonight.

I am so glad my feelings towards school are back on the positive side. Let's see how long they last! LOL!

On an unrelated note...the 2nd year I carpool with has entered into to phase of telling me a lot of stuff that I don't think I am supposed to know! LOL! Today during our ride to and from school she was just telling me A LOT of stuff! About her, her husband, her family, one of her best friends, some classmates, darn near everyone! At one point I asked her why she was telling me this stuff (some stuff was very personal and even though we cool, we not at that point of relaying that kind of info to each other) and her answer was simple....

"I don't know"

Then proceeded to tell me more! LOL! I swear I will blog in the future about meeting her husband and having very ackward moments because I will have to act like I don't know anything beyond the basics about him! *sigh* Why did she do this to me? LOL!

Holiday weekend was ok. Didn't do anything vacation like and rounded me up a speeding ticket before all was said and done! Been a minute since I had one of those written up on me. The cop said if I go to court it's a good chance I could get it reduced due to my clean record. People are telling me that if I go I could get the ticket dropped. I really don't feel like going to court.

Pooka went to NY with her father from Friday to Monday and had a blast! Her father is looking kinda sick and aged. When I asked him about his health he said he got it so I left it alone. I am glad they got to hang out and Pooka got to a chance to hang with her paternal peeps.

Dat's bout it!

Blogger out!

FB and Gary Coleman

2010-05-28T15:35:00.003-05:00

I need my fb friends to stop posting that "What you talking 'bout Willis?" was their favorite Gary Coleman line! I mean really people, did he have any other popular lines in his career? Sheesh!

R.I.P. Gary Coleman

*end small vent*

Feeling some kinda way

2010-05-25T03:20:00.004-05:00

I want to laugh real hard.

I want to cry.

I want to scream.

I want to walk around on the beach with a cool breeze flowing like I don't have a care in the world.

I want to lay in the bed for a week with the covers over my head.

I want everyone to have their "best week ever".

I want you to be happy.

I want to feel better.

I want a hug.

I want to maintain my sanity.

I want to give away all my responsibilities just for a little while.

I want to go to the gun range and let go.

I want another reminder of why I chose PT school.

I want to not feel like a failure in multiple areas of my life right now.

I want to study harder, but not at the same time.

I want to be better at encouraging myself to keep going.

I want to know that it's all worth it.

I want to be sleep.

I want to be around you.

I want the stress to disappear.

I want to make everyones life easier, including mine.

I want it to be someone else's fault.

I want to throw tantrum.

I don't know what I want.............

maybe I should go back to bed and continue to pretend to sleep.

I need to study.

I should study.

Whatever.

It keeps getting better

2010-05-23T15:53:00.002-05:00

My step mother has MS.

She hasn't walked in 3 years.

She got sensors placed in her body.

She is walking, not 100%, but walking.

Amen.

Short Pooka clip

2010-05-23T11:17:00.003-05:00

I am still not 100% health wise but whatever, life goes on.

Pooka tested for her green belt yesterday and did very well. Every testing period someone gets titled "best of testing", which means they did the best overall. Pooka came very close to getting the title! Which is still awesome! Even though she doesn't read my blog, shout outs to Master Kick Butt w/One Hand for letting her test when technically she wasn't supposed to!

Here's a clip of her and 3 other high yellow belts doing their pomsee. Not being biased, but she performed it the best out of the 4 :-P

On Friday we found out that Pooka passed all sections of her EOG (end of grade) tests! The EOGs are our states standardized test for grades 3-12. Fun! *smirk* This was Pooka's first year having to take the series of tests and we both were a bit nervous about the math tests (there are 2 of them). However, she did great! She told me yesterday that she was having her best week ever! I am so proud of her!

All I did was sneeze

2010-05-21T15:08:00.002-05:00

and my body went out of wack! It has been the most acute onset of anything I've ever had!

Last night I was feeling fine. I was chilling in my bed parlaying with Snookums and I felt my nose tingling indicating a sneeze coming, so I put him on hold.

I sneezed and immediately I had a nose full of nastiness. Right after I cleared my nose I'd sneeze again bringing another nose full of nastiness! This happened 4 times in a row back to back. When the episode was over I felt like CRAP! I ended the convo, took some meds, and went to bed.

I woke up feeling like I had done a high intensity total body workout. My whole body was aching. It still does.

My nasal nastiness is clear so I'm not infected with anything. I have recently developed sinus issues, but the last time I had an episode I didn't have the body ache with it. So I am ruling that out at the moment.

I've looked online for a possible diagnosis for my symptoms (clear drippy nose, teary eyes, and body ache) but came up with NADA!

My pathology professor said Hay Fever, I don't know if I buy that.

I just needed a soundboard to vent about this!

Carry on.

SSDD

2010-05-19T07:26:00.002-05:00

Nothing really new going on.

Mom is back home. She was discharged on Monday. She's happy and on the mend wagon.

A portion of my life is falling apart, but I am doing what I can to stay sane and prevent myself from having a pity party about it. Thank goodness this is only a temporary set back.

Somebody I don't particularly care for (I don't remember if I gave her a blog name) sent me a friend request and a very complimentary message. Not sure what I am going to do with the request or message.

Scale looks better every time I step on it. This time next year I should be extra fierce! LOL!

I tried the Skype thing recently. It's a really cool program. I just have to soup up my computer some how to keep it working for long periods of time. I tried Skyping with Snookums and it was going great till his picture froze. I'd go out then back in, it would work, then freeze again :-( I have to play with some more buttons and see if I can fix that.

Found out what I'd be doing for my birthday. A few months ago my step mother invited me to the beach. They rent a condo on the beach for a week every summer. This year it's the week after my birthday (which falls on a wknd this year! YAY) and during another special date in my life. I forgot all about the invite till recently. So in a couple of months Pooka, Snookums and I will be beach bound! It's not out of the country like I wanted 30 to be, but I am not complaining! :-)

Relief

2010-05-14T07:49:00.002-05:00

Mom finally had her surgery for her leg yesterday. Everything is all patched up now. I called her when I got home and she was still pretty heavy under the influence of the surgery meds so the conversation was interesting to say the least! LOL! She should be able to come home this weekend. I am going up to visit for Memorial Day weekend. It serves a double purpose. I get to see my mom post surgery and I get to drop Pooka off so she can go with her dad to NY to see her paternal side of the family. She has seen pics of them but she doesn't know them and she was very young when she last seen them so hopefully she can start making lasting connections with that side of her family.

I am chilling. For the last 2 days I felt like someone has punched me in the left eye. Meds, food, rest, nothing helps. Great! I woke up a little before 3am this morning and was up. I didn't get sleepy again until 3o minutes before it was time for me and Pooka to get up. I have already started to pay for it.

My birthday is a bit over 2 months away. Since it's a milestone birthday I would like to do something special. I have been playing with some ideas lately but I have to settle on something soon because the later I book something the more it's gonna cost.

I'll figure something out I guess.

I'm just glad it's Friday.

Thankful

2010-05-07T15:18:00.004-05:00

In the early morning of Saturday, May 1st, my grandmother, mother, aunt, and baby cousin got in the truck above to come to NC for a family reunion. Around 7am the tire blew, they flipped around, they landed upside down. Aunt and cousin able to get out on their own. Mom and grandmother had to be cut out. This pic shows one of my cousins gathering what she can out the truck.

I was at the weekend job. My cell phone started blowing up around 8:10am. Let's just say on Saturday I came close to losing my mother. It was a pretty stressful day to say the least.

Aunt and cousin were discharged that Saturday. Little cousin did not have any burns, scrapes, bruises, NOTHING. Aunt had a lot of bruising, scrapes and burns from the airbag (she was driving). Grand Diva was discharged on Sunday or Monday (don't remember now) with lots of bruising and scratches, but okay. Mom caught the worst of it. She broke a few bones and had respiratory issues that required her to be in the CCU. The medical staff got her breathing on her own, got the blood out of her lungs and out of the CCU. She left the CCU Monday or Tuesday.

Today my grandmother, aunt and cousin are home. My mom is doing well. She tore a lot of ligaments in her leg and was supposed to have them repaired yesterday but some emergency surgeries came up so she got moved to today. She had a stress test yesterday that came back funky so they are doing more tests on her today. At this point we don't know when the surgery is going to be.

I do know that I will be in VA this weekend chilling at the hospital. That's for sure.

Happy Mother's Day to all the moms, moms to be, and single dads that take on both roles. Do something special even if it's only sleeping 10 minutes longer this weekend!

Lata!

Sometimes men just don't feel like it

2010-04-30T07:22:00.004-05:00

By "it" I mean having sex! Interesting isn't it? I thought so.

I was having a chat with Snookums last night and we uncovered that when women are not in the mood, we say no, decline any more advances, and dude just goes to bed without or takes care of if on his own.

But when men are not in the mood and they tell us no. We automatically assume something is wrong. They can never say that they just don't feel like it or they are not in the mood. We always have to ask a million questions "Is it me?""You cheating on me?""You don't find me attractive anymore?" so forth and so on. Most females just can't fathom that a guy could just not be in the mood. Crazy right?

So then when our all our advances are rejected and we ask our questions. We are pissed cuz we aren't getting it on request! LOL!

It's like us females are not used to hearing no or not right now when we make sexual advances. So interesting to me. I never really thought about it till last night.

I wanted a thank you

2010-04-29T06:40:00.005-05:00

I got a defensive msg.

I returned the call.

Came this ----> <---- close to picking up the kid, driving to DC, and punching him in the face. That was the last thing I said before hanging up. I was very serious and he knew it.

Few hours later I got a call. Pooka picked it up. After some chit chat he asked to speak with me. He wanted to know what Pooka needed. I laid out everything I could think of that was a need, then asked him if he wanted to know the wants as well. He declined. I received my thank you. I guess it just took a moment for him to actually READ the email and listen to the words that came out my mouth. Maybe he talked it over with someone. Don't know, don't care. I got my thank you and acknowledgement. That is what I honestly wanted.

He plans to send me some help soon. My email wasn't asking for money. But I'll take it.

It's a miracle! *smirk*

Through These Brown Eyes

What it do boo?

I've been tagged

Happy New Year!!!!!!

Santa was good to me :)

How do the Housewives of whatever city do it?

Testimony

I should blog...LOL

5/25/12

Watch the throne!

1010

Mirrors

Tales from the SNF! (Skilled Nursing Facility)

I love new teachers!

Still nothing going on for real for real, LOL!

Untitled

Pay check

31 years, 31 answers

Howdy

Experienced Dishwasher

1,000!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

999! *w/edit*

I'm in love!

Should I be ig'nant?

2 thumbs pointed my way

She set me up!

6/25/05 = when this relationship started

FN squirrel

Oh Crap

YAY!

Positive Energy

Venting

Give it to me raw!

I love my career choice

Hola!

Happy Mother's Day!!!!!!

Ups and Downs

Tween

Winning!

Failing

Monster Jam!!!!!!

PRINCE!!!!!

Week 3

ARGal Style

Newborns and Rollerskates

A Valentine's Day to remember

975 check in

Smile, it's the weekend!

Busy Saturday

TMI...you've been warned!

My name is Bennett...

I'm a snitch!

I want to be a therapist when I grow up!

Christmas and all that jazz

Merry Christmas!!!

Tomorrow-Destination 12/9/2012, Day 1

I'm a fan

Light at the end of the tunnel

Itis

Happy early Turkey Day!

Another reason I love the fall

Quick and Random

Pooka is awesome

Focus

Where did "O" and SouthernGirl go?

Twin

Procrastination

Random

Dear Cleaning Guy,

Hello, Good morning.

Range of emotions in less than 24 hrs

WTH??????

Just Wright

*sigh* big girl to big girl....

A Pooka moment

Glass half full

Dear Ms. Blogger

It has only been 2 weeks

I am awesome!

Scattered

999! w/edit

sigh big girl to big girl....