Right now I feel like I am doing so much, but not doing nothing at all. I know in my head that I always have something going but looking back all I can recall is me sleeping. I can't really explain it. I've attended all my classes on time, I've studied, I've spent time with Pooka, I've spent time with Snookums, I've been working the job, I've been working the clinic, I have been where I was supposed to be when I was supposed to be there for the most part...yet I feel like I have done nothing. Like I am in this state of plain ole existance.
I can't seem to get my thoughts together and every time I open my mouth all these thoughts flood my head and sometimes I change my mind about something mid sentence. For example, I was at Burger King at 10:25. Lunch starts at 10:30. Instead of asking if they have started lunch what came out my mouth was if they still were serving breakfast. They said yes. I ordered breakfast. I got to the window to get my food and decided to ask my original question, she said yes to that too. So I ordered lunch which is what I wanted anyway. I haven't had fast food very much lately so I am good in that area. The funny thing about the convo between me and the drive thru cashier was that I ordered 3 different things. I would say I wanted one thing, then she'd repeat me to confirm what I wanted, then I say something else.
Me: I want a cheeseburger kids meal
Her: A cheeseburger kids meal?
Me: *pause* hamburger kids meal
Her: Hamburger meal?
Me: *longer pause* whopper jr.
Her: So you want a cheeseburger kids meal, hamburger kids meal, and a whopper jr?
Me: No, I just want a cheeseburger kids meal.
She probably will go home and tell her people about the mentally off chick at the drive through but I swear it all made sense to me. It's not my fault she couldn't see my mind changing! LOL
Then I have left emails and voicemails with folks saying multiple things at the same time. It's not until I've hit send or hung up the phone till I realize that what I just typed or said didn't quite make too much sense. Oh well.
I took my first AT test and I can't tell you how I did. That's unusual for me not to have an idea of how I did. I studied and some stuff looked familiar, the other stuff I just put something down. *shrug* This is so not the attitude of someone trying to ace this class.
I want to say this is a sign I need a vacation, but I had the unexpected day off work yesterday after getting a call from the school stating Pooka was not feeling so hot. We chilled, took a nap and everything. I don't feel any clearer minded.
Other than that my van and my place are a MESS! It's a damned shame. I did attempt to wash the dishes but halfway through but my motivation to finish escaped me. My aunt says that a messy place is a sign of depression. Depending on the circumstance I think that is true. But I am not depressed, stressed out, or nothing like that. I think it's just plain laziness. I will get my mind and possessions together soon. Definitely before the weekend is out.