Sunday, September 07, 2008


I don't have an office to go tomorrow.

Kinda don't wanna go to the hospital.

GRE is Thursday.

Wish it was passed me.

My mother's older sister died on 9/11, many years before that date became engraved in many people heads across the US.

9/11/2001 I was in the bed with my 15 day old newborn watching the towers get hit over and over and over and over on court tv.

Mommy spent the weekend with me. So did Lsbnmoms children. I enjoyed every ones company but I am glad they are gone.

A friend of mine brought a sex toy then realized she already had this particular toy. She could not take it back to the store so guess who she gave it too?

Another bullet was supposed to be the next addition to my stash but hey, a free toy is a free toy!

5 years from now I am going to be one sexy ass doctor. I have daydreams about a much more slender me walking around with my locks in a neat bun up top, some hanging in the back, and I am visiting my old state job in a fly and fitting pin stripped pant suit and killer heels.

Marlon, who is back to blogging for the moment, lost 80 pounds since January. If I would have been acting right I could have been losing with him, not gaining.

When I think about my future I get scared.

You can't do the same old thing over and over and expect something different to happen.

Me resigning is such a good thing. I know this. So why am I scared? Stepping out of the comfort zone the state provided is part of it, but sheesh!

What if I don't make it and fail?

I don't even know what other field I would go into if several attempts at PT don't work out.

It would suck.

Yeah, think positive, pray, and all that. I know I know.

I wonder what you look like in person.

I think you two are the cutest new blog couple around hand down! I NEVER saw it coming. I peeped the pic of you two together and yall are so freakin' cute! I literally went Awwwwwwwwwwwwww. Guess I should have read both of your blogs more often huh? LOL! So if this thing goes legal can I get an invite to the wedding?

I still don't believe that you two broke up! Yall were the cutest blogging couple that defied many odds IMO. Neither one of you are talking/blogging about what happened and it's probably for the best to handle it in private.....but still....DAMN! I don't want to wrap my head around it.

I love you.

And you too, just in a different way.

Hey, of course I love you too. You're family for crying out loud!

Sometimes I wonder if I should stop trying to be friends with you.

In the 8 years or so that we've known one another I think the first time I've heard you laugh THAT hard and act silly was the other day. I know I got quiet, but I just didn't know how to digest it. I honestly can't remember a time when you was in that kind of mood. It wasn't bad, not bad at all, just different than what I am used to from you. I wouldn't mind being a witness to that side of you more often.

From the outside looking in she was giving you all the signs that you were coming on a bit too strong. You still have her, just SLOW DOWN so you can keep her. I like to see my friends and associates happy.

Sometimes I wonder about your priorities. We are all grown and we run our households the way we see fit, but your choices frighten me from time to time. There will come a time when your normal support system will not be able to bail you out of that sticky situation.

Now that you've moved away I wonder if you still read my blog to check on me from time to time. I deleted the cell number I had for you cuz when I called it awhile ago it didn't do that cool ring thing that you had set up. I wish you all the best with your new endeavors and hope you bust out those great grades in school.

Mommy, I know you are allergic to computers and don't even know what a blog is and that I have one, but between you and Snookums you are my outlets to talk to about anything. I know both of you zone out on me rambling on from time to time, but that's okay. At least you all pretend to listen to me when your not! LOL! You're my mother and my friend and I love you to pieces. Now do me a favor and tell me what you want for your birthday. You know I quit my job so if you want something big I gotta start saving now! *wink* Oh yeah, I am still curious about how the thought that I needed TWO first aid kits, rubbing alcohol, shampoo, conditioner, body wash, a flashlight, batteries, and a small travel bag came to be? Just so you know, I don't put very much of anything in my hair so the shampoo and conditioner will be used on your grandbaby! LOL! Keep the body wash coming tho'!

I literally just remembered that I have a lab report due tomorrow @ 10am. Guess I should be typing it vs. blogging huh?


blkbutterfly said...

major change always makes us question if we're doing the right thing. it's ok to be scared. you'll be fine!

i'm still not sure about retaking the GRE. i better hurry up and decide before there aren't anymore testing dates left.

i've been thinking about writing open notes/letters to ppl as a post. but, then i forget what i wanted to say.

Freaky Deaky said...

I feel like there should've been a panty related mention directed at me. It saddens me that there wasn't. :o( You can send pictures to make it up to me. :o)

I always get a few e-mails from people asking or assuming I was talking about them when I do this type of post. Wonder how many you'll get?

I watched the 9/11 coverage after recently giving birth without coming down with postpartum depression?

Only a woman would give a sex toy as a gift or accept one from another. :oD

Good luck with the GRE.

Thoughts of a Southern gal said...

You had a house full this weekend.

I understand you being scared with stepping out of your comfort zone. But don't let your fear deter you of your goals. You can do it Ladynay.

Rashan Jamal said...

You talking about me? Am I part of the cutest blog couple? If so, then slow down with the wedding talk. If not, then carry on. LOL

Good luck on the GRE and the returning to your job looking fly!

Ms.Honey said...

LOL all I could comment on was the toy...WOOHOOO gotta love new toys that you didnt have to buy :)

by the way..I hated studying for the GRE

Ladynay said...

BB, If you don't have to take the test over I wouldn't even fool with it.

I was going to do a whole post with segments to different people but it wasn't long enough for my liking so I stuck it on to this one.

Freaky, check you account.

I haven't got any. With the exception of maybe 3 statements they know who I was talking to. :-)

I didn't suffer from postpartum. At least I don't remember going through it.

Yeah, a dude giving his homebody a sex toy would probably trigger a weird moment. The double standard is horrible, but it exists.


Southern, A house full plus some. I couldn't imagine that many people in my small apartment on a regular basis.

The closer I get to doing it,the more fearful I become. I won't stop cuz I'm too far into it.

Rashan, I don't know what you're talking about! Just cuz you just happened to start dating another blogger recently, look cute together, and a pic of yall all bunned up cheesin' is online doesn't mean I'm talking about you two! *wink* LOL!

Honey, here here! LOL! Free stuff is usually good!

I don't think there are many people who do like studying for standardized tests :-( I just want to get the damn thing over with.

*Ms.B* said...

Change is inevitable, growth is intentional. Girl you will be fine just keep that picture of that bad doctor in mind.

"I Can Do All Things Through Christ Who Strengthens Me"
Philippians 4:13

Ladynay said...

Yeah, the daydreams are definitely something to look forward to :-)

kasandra said...

It's a scary thought but you gotta do what ya gotta do!!! You'll be fine though chicka.

Freaky Deaky said...

That's just mean. It would serve you right if I actually had that account. Then you'd have to send me pictures. x(

Yeah, I think me a Raheem might come to blows if he tried to give me one of his extra vibrating butt plugs or something. *shudders*

Darius T. Williams said...

Sorry - but um, that sex toy comment got to me. Any tips?

Torrance Stephens - All-Mi-T said...

u gone do fine on the gre