A new day

I am smiling, the sun is shining and my stomach is content. I didn't realize how little I had eaten until talking with someone yesterday. When they asked me what I had for lunch....nothing...breakfast...nothing...then he asked when was the last time I ate. I hadn't eaten since Tuesday night and when I ate then it was the first thing I eaten that day! I had 2 slices of pie and a PB and J sandwich that I shared with Pooka on Tuesday night. On Monday I had a whole PB and J and a bowl of rice and beans. On Sunday I had some Oddles of Noodles, pizza and one barbque wing. So with the lowered calories and all that campus walking this week. I know a sister lost some serious water weight! LOL I never in my life would thought that I would FORGET to EAT!!!!! My friend says it's stress related, who knows?

Last night was my first class of my one day a week Human Nutrition course with Prof. Laidback. I already know I am gonna like her. Part of her initial Hey how you doing let me tell you about myself stuff, she says that she has a 7 month and a 4 year old and instead of having us leave at 8:15 she will lecture st8 through and have us leave at 7:30!!!!!! Sweet! She also says that since she has small kids, things may come up, she may alter the schedule sometimes! YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH with me having a 4 year old also (well she'll be on Saturday) that is just fine by me! She is one of those teachers that is flexible but knows her stuff. When she started her lecture she was on it! Prof. Umfufu talked a little more english and has the nerve to crack jokes half the class. Maybe it's the horniness but he had on this black and white Nike outfit with matching shoes that made him look kinda cute, but anyways! Next...

On my ride home from classes I was ready to give my "company" the speech I had dreamed about last night. The "real food" conversation kept running through my head so by time I put my key in the door I was HOT!!!!! They were sitting in the living room and my body language must have told them I wasn't in the best of moods. I changed clothes and went to the kitchen to get something to eat. When all that was in my kitchen was about 3 servings of oatmeal I just stood there in shock and felt my pressure rise that much more. Then K-digga asks me how my day was and I just started to laugh (bad sign) I mumbled long and just went to my room and shut the door. I knew if I saw either one of them I would have been less then appropriate. I called my therapist. He isn't really a therapist, just a good friend whose known me forever and always seems to know the right things to say and questions to ask. After the conversation I was back to normal so I enter the living room to express myself.

This ended up being a very lengthy st8 up talk. I put all my thoughts and concerns out there and they spoke their peace. The end result is that I will stick to my plan. If they don't find sometype of progress by Sept 6, I will take them back to the shelter. As far as I understand we are all on the same page.

After all that and I get into bed, Baby daddy calls. He tells me that he will be staying at a hotel Friday but will be with Pooka all day Saturday. Let me back track a bit. Saturday is Pooka's fourth birthday. About a month ago Baby daddy calls and lets me know he plans to be here for it. Okay fine. Then a few weeks later he wants to know if he could stay with me. Okay fine. Once I entered into my head that he was gonna be here overnight the whole weekend, I planned to get some bootay. I know, I know, hush! So when he called and said he was staying at a hotel Friday, my mind was like "okay, so which old pussy has he got up with now?". But I ended up saying "Okay, that's fine. Do what you want as long as you spend Saturday with Pooka". That was mistake number one for me. Not saying what I really thought. Being that I don't want conscience left overs and the chicks I knew he messed with here are not the most hygenic chicks, I let the thought of some bootay go. We end conversation.

He calls back about an hour later and tells me he is spending Friday and Saturday night at the hotel and will come see Pooka "for a little while" on Saturday! WHAT???? I thought the purpose of this trip was to spend time with your seed on her b-day, not reunite with some old nani! At least he said Pooka was the reason. So I find that attitude again and get snippy. I am mad that he is coming down and spending more time with some chick than his daughter. Then I am mad that my bootay plans where messed up.

This upsets me? Why? I don't know! I know for a honest fact that I am no longer in love with Baby daddy. I know for a honest fact that we could never work again as a functioning couple. I know for a fact that I will always have love for him and care about his well being. But why am I mad we not hooking up? So I did what I normally do and went to plan B. I called plan B up and realized that plan B told me they were gonna call me back and didn't. So I left a sacastic message and kept it moving.

Class was class. Went to the place to pick of my food. Dropped it off at the crib. Very few words were spoken in the 5/10 minutes it took to put the food away. I left with a "don't eat all the food"! Can't have that crap from last night happen again. I can't wait for his food stamps to come in. I am gonna have them label there stuff. Call it petty if you want to but you never seen these people eat! The only reason I ran low on food this month is because I didn't buy enough groceries to feed everyone, just me and Pooka. Which is what I do every month. Once he shops I may ask for an item or vice versa, but they eat what they get and I eat what I get. Besides, I get stuff like soy milk and veggies went I grocery shop for the month. They don't really get down like I do.

Since I have been at work 3 folks have called. One of Baby daddy's exgirls and her new man are having a cookout Saturday that we have all been invited, LadyNay included. BD's ex was hollering at Whitebrotha for a hot second so everyone knows everyone except K-digga. And no this is not the same ex that BD and Whitebrotha had in common. Without trying to explain all this crap, I will say that everything is okay. Personally I don't wanna see this chick, but whatever! Here's a good way to have Taria run around with some kids on her B-day! I can kinda dub it a b-day party for her in my mind, plus she spends time with her dad, and I don't have crap to clean up afterwards. Can't get no better!

Hello to the folks I don't know that fell onto my blog. Please come and go as you wish, just check on me from time to time if you don't mind. I have no theme. I am not all that funny. Just a regular ole day 2 day log. I blog from my head. Eye dun't uooze speel chek. My thoughts are scattered. And, grammer errors: are quite-common$

Hey Barrylicous!!!! I see you found my new hang out! *muah*