Friday, November 03, 2006

Let's get physical, physical!

My annual physical is this morning. It kinda sucks. I already know what's gonna happen and what they are going to say.

I know I gained weight

I know I need to lose

I know my blood pressure is darn near textbook

I know losing at least 10% of my body weight would make a big difference

I know to undress and put that paper gown on

I know to lay on the table

I know to put my feet in the stirrups

I know to relax and breath when you bout to do your thing

I know that one yall like to use first ain't gonna cut it so why you act like you know better than me? I mean, I have been to EVERY last physical I have ever had and I know what works and it's not that one!

I know I have a balance, Imma take care of that. You lucky I just got paid.

so forth and so on.

On a different note, I am racist. Yesterday out slight irritableness and boredom I put out another online personal ad. I was irritated because when I called Mr. T-lo he was acting like I was bothering him by my call, even tho' the first thing I asked him was if he was busy and his response was no. This doesn't make the first or second time this has happened or why I am ill. I am irritated because he went on this long spill about how I don't seem to care about him and our friendship and that I never call him blazah blah which kinda hurt my feelings. So I started to change up and contact him more often. So now it's like I am bothering him by getting in contact with him! But he is the one that said I didn't do it enough! I CAN'T WIN!

So anyways I threw an ad up and before I changed my mind and took it down, 2 people had responded to it. One was a new dude, but guess who the other dude was.....BOSSMAN!!! Yep Model's husband! I laughed so daggone hard my coworker came to check on me! ROFL! Since when has he liked big women??? Times must be getting hard cuz he has always been about the skinny minnies! The only thing he lied about was the age of his child. I never responded back to his reply to my ad even tho' part of me wanted to mess with his head alittle bit. Ole nasty self! LOL!

I did respond to the new dude w/the blurry picture. We sent emails back and forth and I can tell he is not very computer friendly so I asked if it would be easier to communicate by phone. We exchange numbers and when he called he later yesterday evening he got my voice mail. When I checked my messages I heard a very deep accent and I was turned off. That's when it hit me that I was a tad racist. I sat myself down and had to reevaluate myself. My "brothers" back home are Nigerian and they have an accent. One of my long term crushes (the one who separated from his wife not too long ago) has an accent so thick I have to ask him to repeat himself sometimes, 'pecially when he is taking fast. Shoot, even T-lo and Kuntry have thick accents even tho' theirs are southern and american. So why did he lose points as soon as I heard he wasn't from here? I still can't place the accent yet.

I told myself I would call him back after I got Pooka down because when you first start talking to people the first few convo's tend to be long. I ended up falling asleep myself and didn't wake up till after 1am. I am not sure if he appreciates calls that late so I didn't call. I will later today.

Well time to go wash the cooch extra good so the good folks with the letters behind their name can have an extra clean pathway to my cervix! LOL

*sidenote* why do we do a little extra something something when we know somebody is gonna be down that way? I mean we wash everyday, most of us anyways, so there is really no need to wash our stuff x+1 or 2 times when we normally wash it x times, but we do it anyways......

19 comments:

deepnthought said...

Godd luck on the physical. I hate them. They always say the same thing for me too, except this last time. Anyway, I hope it goes better than expected. Go ahaed and call the man. I have to admit I am a little racist to. Then again, I have been told my accent is terrible. LOL. Have a good day and week.
I think we do the extra just to make sure there are no surprises down there.

LUVIN ME said...

Call him...

It's just the thought of a someone else being down there that makes us self-consious I guess...

blkbutterfly said...

oh, i dread those physicals. i hate them with a passion! well, it's actually the pap smear part that i hate. everything else is whatever...

call dude back and see what he's about. he might surprise you...

4EverJennayNay said...

I hate those physicals. Its gonna be my turn soon. No thank you.

No thank you to those cold instruments and strange hands touching my specialness.

No Thank You!

a man! oooh wee!

It's getting cold. You know its cuddle time!

Ladynay said...

DNT, I hope the change in the standard spill was good. They changed mine up and said I need to lose 20% vs. 10%! LOL I will call him when I get home. Can't have a getting to know you convo at work.

Luvin, I will, just later. Girl I felt so violated when it was over! LOL

BB, then they have the nerve to put like a poster or a wind chime on the ceiling for you to look at like it's gonna make the pap any better!!! ROFL

Nay, I totally forgot (I don't know how) about the internal check were she gotta finger me and press on stuff!

While I was driving to work I was comparing my physical to a bad sexual experience...

You lay down, they fondle your breast, you spread your legs, they probe you with instruments, they finger you, they tell you their done and to put your clothes on while walking out the door! HAHAHAHAHAHA Can I get mine first? ROFL

TTD said...

lmao @ Well time to go wash the cooch extra good so the good folks with the letters behind their name can have an extra clean pathway to my cervix! ur a nut!

so the dude that you knew is still married??? *shaking my head*

Ladynay said...

TTD, Bossman and Model are separated. Model started yelling divorce over some REALLLY stupid stuff. Bossman didn't want to divorce or separate, but she insists, so he's back on the prowl.

blkbutterfly said...

wind chime? girl, i've never been in a place that had a wind chime or even a poster! i've always had to look at a blank ceiling.

and you're so on point about the exam being like a really bad sexual experience. LOL

Ladynay said...

Dag, they don't even make the cheesy attempt to make it better? hahahahaha and it really is if you think about it that way!

Ladynay said...

There is a running joke about a mother that mistakenly took her son's craft cloth instead of a wash cloth while prepping for a pap and the punch line was what the doc said about the glitter in her nani. I want to tell the joke so bad but I can't remember all of it! LOL

I called myself racist because I lost interest the moment I heard in his accent that American or "black" is possibly not his backround. :-( But right now all of that is an assumption.

Freaky Deaky said...

If I sound like Mike Tyson on helium does that mean I'm disqualified from the Ladynay sweepstakes?

I knew there was a reason why I liked playing doctor.

You have me wanting to do an online personals ad. I'll have to find the pics before the accident or edit them better but maybe I'll find someone. ;o)

Ladynay said...

Freaky, yeah it does, I can't have a man with a higher pitched voice than mine. LOL

As long as all your patients didn't stank I can see why you would wanna play doctor! This one girl came in the door smelling like God knows what, her and her stankin' man! Yuck! I hope she didn't have to drop her panties for them!

Online ads are worth a try, but that's about it. But there are looney tunes, just like the ones on BP! LOL

Freaky Deaky said...

[Hangs up the phone.] Why do you have to be so picky? My voice wasn't a problem that night. Just for that I'm going to wait until I have a cold and crank call you.

I would think that if it was a pay service that would eliminate a good portion of your run of the mill nutjobs. Maybe not. (SIGH) They seem to find me no matter what.

No, stank puss scares me more than roaches. It makes my voice really get high. LOL! So when can I schedule you an appointment with Dr. Freaky?

Ladynay said...

Hmmmmm most mens voices get deeper when they are sick, so call on my brotha! LOL

Nutjobs have money to pay for personal sites too, but like you said, you may encounter less...

ASAP doc! I have this reoccuring pain in certain sensitive areas that need to be slowly and throughly examined.....

Lady J said...

Hey your physical sounds alot like mine. lol Don't feel bad. When you are ready to take care of business you will.

Call him. What do you have to lose.

Paula D. said...

Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! I'm laughing about the extra attention to the cooch when we know someone will be 'down there' too funny & too true!

Ladynay said...

LadyJ, I am slowly trying to forget this morning happened! ROFL

When you catch up on your blogs your gonna notice a reoccuring theme of "Go for it, what do you have to lose" I have been reading and typing that a lot recently!

PAULAAAAAAAAA! Hey chicka, you know I'm right! Now lemme go catch up on your blog!

Emotionalbrotha said...

As a brotha who is about to revalidate his bisexual card, thanks for washing the coochie extra...lol.. u do it, cause i mamma taught u too and that was a good lesson.

In regards to T-Lo, he want what he want when he want it.

In regards to being racist, we all got a lil bit in us... but hey u know them foreign dudes be packin so u might get what u need after all

Ladynay said...

Mmmmmmmm Hmmmmm I knew SnC was gonna bring you back to the dark side! Even if it's not her I know she got something to do with it! ROFL!!!

T-lo's special he hasn't called me this weekend and I think that's a good thing right now.

I spoke with new dude and I am still not convinced that I want to move forward in getting to know him.